Selcouth • Grayson Dolan

| 03 | Broken Hopes

"Morning," I heard. I turn my head to see Ethan, rubbing his eye while he walked slowly towards the fridge.

"Morning" I mumbled, taking a bite off my green apple and leaning forward, placing my forearms on top of the table to watch how their acts resembled each other's.

Twins. I thought to myself.

They both start cooking some pancakes for themselves and I hear the door bell ring. Joanne was finally here.

"I'll get it" I muttered and hopped off my seat, jogging towards the door to open it.

"Hey girl," Joanne smiled. I smiled back and stepped aside, letting her in.

"Let's go to my room, I gotta tell you something." I grab her wrist and drag her upstairs with me.

Once we arrived, I close the door behind me. Joanne threw her self on my bed and held her head with the palm of her hand, putting weight on her elbow.

"I legit don't know what to do with Grayson anymore"

"Oh lord, here we go" she rolled her eyes and chuckled.

I sighed. "It's just, I don't know" I trailed off, crossing my arms and walking around my room in circles.

"You still love him, don't you?" She blurted out.

My walking stopped and my heart skipped a beat. The words echo in the back of my mind as I raise my eyebrows at her. "No." I bit my lip."No way." I repeated, trying to convince myself that her words were all just a simple lie. I shook my head and looked away from her, avoiding eye contact.

"May, I see the way you look at him. You talk about him almost all the time when you're with me."

I groaned, tilting my head back in realization. "Do I really?"

"Hmhm" She nods her head doubtlessly, as if she was a hundred and one percent sure about her whole concept of me still loving Grayson.

I thought about it for a few minutes. I hated him for what he did, that was for sure, but if I hated him that much, he shouldn't have been in my mind all this time. My eyes nor my mouth shouldn't have been on and about him.

"Fuck" I covered my face with the palms of my hands and laid on my back, placing my head on her stomach. "What do I do now?" I sighed.

"Talk to him, girl" Joanne said, "You guys can't stay mad at each other forever and I'm sure as hell you can start all the way back from zero, as friends, ya know"

I bit my lower lip, taking into consideration her suggestion. Perhaps she was right. Afterall, I missed Grayson like crazy, even if he had been right next to me this whole time.

I nodded my head and sat up. "Yeah, I-I should"

Joanne smiled. "Then go on! I'll be right behind you"

"But what do I tell him?"

"Everything. Tell him you want your friendship back. Tell him how you feel."

I let out a deep sigh. "Easy to say, hard to do, but sure, fuck it, let's go" I got up, running a hand through my hair, preparing myself mentally to face Grayson. I did not have a good feeling about this, when all these what if's questions began shooting the walls of my mind.

"Yeah that's more like it girl!" She hopped off the bed and followed me downstairs.

"Let's-" My sentence got cut off by another door bell ring.

"Who would that be?" I asked myself, looking at the clock, showing it was just 3 in the afternoon, way too early for the twin's parents to arrive, since they worked till 7pm.

I jogged towards the door, opening it to reveal a girl, a little taller than me, wearing layers upon layers of makeup on her face. She was wearing a backwards snapback on her head. A pink snapback to be specific. It was Gray's.

"Hi, is Grayson here?" She asked politely, flashing an innocent smile towards me. I stare at her for a while, before finally snapping back to the real world.

"Um, yeah, he's in the kitchen" I pointed my thumb towards the kitchen and stepped aside to let her in.

"Thanks" She said and walked towards the kitchen. Her sweet scent following behind.

I looked over to Joanne, who was sitting on the sofa with the same facial expression as me.

"Who is that?" I mouthed, only to receive a simple shrug from Joanne.

"Hey baby!" I heard her say. "Sup babygirl" Grayson said. His voive echoing throughout the house. I watched her walk closer to him, wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him. He kissed back without hesitation and placed a hand on her hip, smiling through the kiss.

My jaw clenched as I felt my eyes filling up with tears. I bit my lip, trying hard to stop my tears from falling down my cheeks.

"May" Joanne's face softened and wrapped her arms around me, pulling me into a hug.

"Let's just- Let's just get out of here" I stuttered. My voice cracked as I spoke.

"Sure, baby" She whispered and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, rubbing my back as we left the house.

I knew then, at that instance, that love, had given up on me. And that I, had given up on love too.

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you know what to do ;)

This was such a long ass chapter wow

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Thanks for reading!

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