Miss me? - A Sheriarty/Mormor AU

It's never twins...

AFTER 'THE ABOMINABLE BRIDE'
SHERLOCK'S POV

I jumped off the jet and stumbled over to the sleek black car parked just off the runway.
"Now Sherlock. This car will take you to my office. I will join you there after I've had a brief word with Doctor Watson." Mycroft rambled on but I'd lost interest as soon as he opened his mouth.
"It's never twins" I muttered under my breath just loud enough so that the large security guard next to me shot a quizzical (and rather ape-like) glance at me.
Mycroft finished his rant and nodded towards the car indicating I should get in. Instead I walked over to John and wrapped my arms around him. I hate it when I'm high and I get all emotional.
"Sherlock what are you doing?" John yelped as he squirmed in my arms.
"Just make sure Mycroft doesn't bore you too much John" I let go of John and gave Mary a quick hug before turning and climbing into the car.
As soon as the car door shut, the driver pulled away. The ride was long and tedious.
---------------------------------------------
About an hour and a half later the same car dropped me back to Baker Street. For over an hour Mycroft and I had discussed what Moriarty's plans might be and how he could have survived shooting him self through the head. Unfortunately we got nowhere. There was no explanation to his return, if it was indeed a return and not just a hoax.

I climbed up the stairs to my flat and I could see that John still wasn't home yet. Where was Johns chair? It wasn't where it should be. Where was it? Then I remembered. John doesn't live here anymore, and I moved his chair so I could see into the kitchen. Of course.

I looked around the living room. Empty. I had no cases, nothing. I walked into the kitchen. No food and Mrs Hudson was elsewhere. Great. I finally gave up looking for something to do and marched to my room in a strop. I lay on my bed, not caring to change, and I closed my eyes. A few hours in my mind palace could be useful right now.

However, I was distracted by my phone. It began to vibrate, as I ignored the buzzing it fell off the side-table and crashed onto the floor. I picked it up. I glanced at who was calling and froze. The name on the phone was definitely a new contact but it wasn't a new name:
JIM FROM I.T.
I slid my middle finger across the screen, answering the call. Shakily, I raised my hand to my ear and spoke.
"Hello" my voice cracked a bit.
"Hi" a familiar voice sang down the line. "How are you?"
"Moriarty? How can you be alive?" I ignored his question.
"No Sherlock. That's not how this is going to work. I phoned you so I'm going to say what I want. I want to have a 'normal' conversation with you. A little catch up. It has been, like, 3 years since we last spoke." Moriarty talked as though we were old friends.
"But..."
"How are you?" He spoke over the top of me.
I hesitated before I answered "fine. You?"
"I'm good. I have a bit of a headache to be honest. So, what's happened whilst I've been away?" I tried so hard not to react to his joke. It was quite clear that he hadn't changed.
"Well, Um....I met a man called Charles Augustus Magnussen. Um....I shot him though."
"Remind me I need to talk to you about him when we next meet." Moriarty cut in.
"What makes you think we'll meet?" I queried.
"Do go on." Came the reply. He was beginning to sound a little bit annoyed now.
"Right. Yes. Um....John got married and he's..... No! No no no! I can't do it! How are you alive James how can you be alive?!" I yelled down the phone.

There was silence for a while. Then I heard giggling. I could hear Moriarty at first then a deeper voice began laughing as well. I furrowed my eyebrows.
"What is it? What's happening?" I was frantic now. What was so funny?

I could hear Moriarty speaking now:
"Sebby stop it I need to speak to this guy." The other man mumbled something. "He's a client" more mumbling "no not now Sebby. Later. Okay?"

I listened harder to make out what 'Sebby' was saying.
"I love you boss" I was shocked at this. Someone loved James Moriarty?
"Love you too. Now get lost." Wait! Was that James? Was he in a relationship? What the actual...?

"Sherlock? You still there?" The sound of his voice made me jump. I just sat, staring at the phone, dumbfounded. "Sherlock, dear? Are you okay?"

I hung up on him and threw my phone across the room. It smashed on my wardrobe, I watched as the various parts rolled around the floor. I lay back on my bed, exhaled a breath I didn't know I was holding and relaxed. I opened my top drawer and pulled out an extra phone I had as a spare. I messaged Mycroft, John, Mary and Lestrade:

Hey,
I need you to be here tomorrow at some point. I don't care when just get here. Ok?
— SH

I finally closed my eyes and fell into a nightmare riddled sleep.