Forever Ruined

Chapter Nine

He knew Claremont had been by his side since the storm but he also knew Claremont would be taking his place among the crew now that his vision had not returned. All his hopes, dreams of becoming a Captain, of commanding his own ship now laid crushed beneath the waves. All his sacrifices and time spent away from the family he loved, pointless.

"Guess you found another to teach you?"

Without Sturgis to guide her, the first few days she was at a complete loss. Until miracle of miracles the crew started to show her the ropes. Many had known what she had done that night. Risking herself alongside of Mr. McCree to bring them to safety. She quickly learned the routine of a cabin boy, and anything else anyone chose to show her.

Sturgis rolled over in his bunk turning his back to her. "Just go."

Clara backed out of the room, not knowing what to do. Wishing there was some way to make everything better. She had to get going or she'd be late. She made sure to loudly close the door so he'd know she left the room.

By the afternoon, she was dragging her body to do the next chore. Lord Fitton was expecting her. She had not been much help to him in his work. She felt guilty about that but there was much to be done, with Sturgis in the condition he was in.

Mr. McCree made it known her duties were now first to the officers and secondary to Lord Fitton. He took the news well. Still she tried to get to him as often as she could to draw what flowers he had brought onboard and write what notes he would dictate to her.

"Ah, Claremont, there you are." He placed a Pentstemon Levigata in front of her or at least that is what he told her the name was of the small bell shaped flowers on the tall green stalks. She pulled the parchment closer to her and began to draw.

"Claremont. Claremont!" Clara jumped as Lord Fitton's hand touched her shoulder.

"You are drooling on the drawing."

Clara looked down horrified, and Lord Fitton laughed as she wiped her lips with the back of her sleeve.

"No worries. It will dry," he said still chuckling as he picked up the paper and placed it aside.

Clara clicked open her watch and frowned, thirty minutes had passed. Why did he not wake her sooner?

"You need rest Claremont. The plants will still be here. The ship has docked and may be so for some time until the mast is repaired. They will need to find replacements for the injured and deceased crew members too, if they can."

She snapped the watch closed. Clara looked at him confused. It struck Fitton just how lost someone so young must be on his first voyage. He has taken several voyages now with the EIC and felt quite at home aboard a ship but Claremont...

"I so wish we could talk... well I talk but I meant... you know... together. Sorry," Lord Fitton said noticing how Claremont body seemed to tense. "I do not mean to offend. I know it is not your choice."

Clara grimaced. Not her choice...she wished she could laugh. Yes it was, and although she had good reason, it had made everything so much more difficult. There were so many times she wished she could talk, especially to Sturgis who now because of his blindness did not even know she was in the room.

She wondered if he would be left behind with the others. The idea was frightening. To have to contend with a new cabin boy, she cared not for all this deception but what choice did she have now. It made life easier not having to conceal her identity to figure out ways to hide when dressing, but that would be all over...unless.

She pulled over a piece of blank paper and began writing.

Lord Fitton stood behind her and read,

"Will Sturgis be sent away?"

Lord Fitton sighed. "It's possible. Many of the men have recovered from the storm but Sturgis' eye sight..."

He read again as she wrote, "But can he not improve?"

"He has slightly. He can see light but everything is still in shadow. Without his ability to see, there is no reason to keep him aboard. He would most likely be dispatched to a hospital close to port."

Clara pounded her fist in frustration against the table and scribbled furiously,

"He needs India. He needs Ayurveda. Those doctors could help him to see."

Lord Fitton looked at Clara with wide-eyed wonder. "How do you...Where did you learn..."

He read, "My father."

"Did he travel with the company?"

Clara just shook her head no. She really couldn't explain. Her father was addicted to books and he was fascinated with the sciences- biology, botany, zoology, and the medical sciences. His library was filled with tomes on those subjects.

She had always been fascinated with India, with Ayurveda, it principles and applied medicines. It seemed almost magical yet so grounded in science and nature. She just knew the doctors there could help him.

She wrote something else. Lord Fitton looked concerned when he read it. "That is a tall order Claremont. To convince Commander Redgrave to keep Sturgis aboard..."

She scribbled again, "No, I can not see how he would be very useful to me as most of what I need help with requires someone to see."

Clara looked crestfallen. She nodded and motioned to be permitted to leave.

"Yes, of course."

Clara turned to leave, but suddenly was seized at the wrist. She looked down at it and back at Lord Fitton. Who suddenly seemed embarrassed and quickly released her.

"I can make no promise but I will see what I can do."

Clara was so overjoyed she reached out to hug him and then realized what she was about to do, stood down and looked mortified at the ground.

Fitton laughed and held out his hand, which she gratefully took. It was a seconds before he let her go. "Claremont, remember no promises."

Clara understood but she had hope. She knew Lord Fitton to be a resourceful sort.

Lord Fitton, wondered what he had gotten himself into. There was just something about Claremont. His eyes, so expressive, one look and you could deny him nothing.

"Brilliant, Fitton. The last thing you need is an entanglement. You will be marooned before the next sunset. Keep to the plan."

He threw his courage to the sticking place and set off in search of Commander Redgrave.