Ok, so apparently someone just told my mom that I'm a lesbian (which of course, isn't true) and I'm freaking out on the inside right now I'm going to kill myself holy shit. I know I'm gay but not a lesbian! If anything, say I'm pan or even bi!
I have some disloyal friends or someone that I must know that have told her. I don't know who told, but I'm getting to the bottom of this at school. I'm going to kill someone. My mother said that she doesn't know whom, but I have a feeling she does, well, more like a hunch.
I can't think of anyone I hate or doesn't like me that would know my secret. So, it could be anyone. It's possible it's not even a student! I'm freaking out right now. I had to play it cool and laugh it off because there's no way she can know the truth just yet. I'm not ready to deal with discrimination just yet. They can hate me when I move out, if I even decide to tell them at all.
Right now, I just feel like I'm stuck in a hard place. I'm not mentally prepared for these things at all. I'm terrified of their reactions, and I'm waiting as soon as I can to finish high school and get my scholarship to college before I even CONSIDER to tell them at all! I'll die while in the closet! I don't want that to happen, but if it does, they're gonna know one way or another. I need to go ahead and right my will, don't I?
Nah.
Anyways, back on point. When I get back to school, I'm investigating the shit out of people. The ones I know and might know of my sexuality... Or just ask if anyone has talked to my mom recently. Or just get my mom to tell me who told her. I'm just so angry right now... And tired. I just want to figure them out and why they're out to tell my mom such a thing who probably knows she's not aware of that.
