The Office Party

Part 5

The rest of the gig passes in a haze. I drown the flat disappointment in quite a bit too much cider. Lizzie also gets drunk and ends up crashing on the sofa at mine. I make it up to my housemate (who stumbles over Lizzie in the morning) by promising to do her share of the housework for a week.

Sunday is dull, both weather-wise and inside me. I can't believe I've been stupid enough to let Diana slip so easily through my fingers. I don't look forward to seeing her at work again. I dread the idea of the frosty atmosphere there's bound to be in her office if we have to have meetings together.

On Monday morning, I notice there's an email invitation from Sandra to a meeting in Diana's office and I open it with some nervousness. But it's for Wednesday, and she's called it 'Wrap Up'. I check with Roger, and he confirms that it will very likely be the last meeting we'll have with Legal on this case. He thanks me for all my hard work on it and drones on for a bit about work and I know I should be flattered and interested, but inside I'm struggling with the idea that Diana and I will no longer work together. No more reason to slip up to her office and stand close to her and enjoy noticing her looking at me and remember the touch of her hand on my leg. No excuse to talk to her, no chance to be with her and breathe in her smell and fantasise about kissing her elegant neck and feel her gaze on me carefully as I talk. No chance to watch her as I explain something and think she's concentrating but wonder with part of my mind if she's really mentally undressing me or whether that's just the way she makes me feel when she looks at me.

***

I dress carefully for the meeting. Even if Diana and I aren't talking and she's lost interest, and mainly because this is probably the last time we'll have anything to do with each other, I want to look good. On Tuesday night I try out several combinations in front of the mirror, and go to bed almost convinced about a pink blouse and the grey skirt I was wearing when Diana snogged me in the toilets at that party. But sleeping on it is always good, and I wake up knowing it has to be a dress. As I wander into the kitchen and wait for the kettle to boil, I decide I know exactly which dress.

I take my housemate her coffee and head off to get ready.

Back in the kitchen, my housemate is eating toast on her way out to catch her lift. She smiles. 'You look nice, Fi. Dressing to impress someone?'

I shrug. 'Something like that. Important meeting.'

'Well, good luck, then.' She grabs her umbrella and bag.

I glance out of the window and decide the drizzly weather looks stuck in for the day and revise my choice of shoes. I was going to go with pretty heels, but I switch to boots at the last minute. Especially if I'm going to have to wait at the bus stop.

***

The dress is plain, mustard-coloured, with a flattering cut and a loose skirt below the knee. I match it with plain silver earrings and a silver necklace above the very slightly dipped collar. I finally go with a pair of brown leather boots, and I pull a soft, dark brown jacket on top. My nails and lipstick are a rich pink and, unusually for work, I just touch up my eyes very slightly. My hair I clasp loosely at the back.

I get a few glances on the bus, and the new apprentice receptionist tells me I look lovely as I sign in. I glance at her to thank her and notice something in her smile. I move off through the lobby and look back as I leave, and she catches my eye and smiles again.

The anticipation of seeing Diana again, maybe for the last time, soon pushes most other thoughts out of my mind. The meeting isn't until 10 o'clock, but I find myself getting increasingly fidgety and nervous as the morning ticks by. I make sure I have all the paperwork ready, I check it through several times, then eventually have to find something else to do. I email Michelle and she agrees to meet me outside.