Part 42

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I don't really notice anything is wrong for a few days.

The day after the meal out, I potter about and make a cake and assume that Diana is subdued because she's working on her speech (which she spends the whole morning doing.) I'm a little disappointed that she's suddenly a bit distant, and am slightly hurt when she brushes me off as I take her another coffee. (In her defence, she probably wasn't expecting my hand on her shoulder, and it must've been very distracting to have me try to cuddle her neck and kiss her hair when she was trying to concentrate.)

She does catch my hand as I withdraw and her touch is very tender. I'm not cross with her, just a bit put out, but she lifts my hand to her lips and kisses it gently. 'Sorry, Fiona.' She leans back and rubs the back of my hand and my wrist softly. She glances up at me and I'm surprised at the anguish in her expression.

I lean in and kiss her forehead. 'It's fine. I'm sorry to disturb you.' I stroke her hair with my free hand. 'Let me know when you want lunch.'

'OK. Thanks.' She smiles thinly, and I can feel her watch me as I leave the room.

***

Eventually, I get hungry and fed up of waiting. I heat up some creamy mushroom soup and make cheese toasties, and hope the smell will entice her back to me. She appears in the doorway of the kitchen, before I even have to call or go to her.

'That smells good, Fiona. Is there some for me?'

I giggle, assuming she's joking. 'Of course.' I spot the serious look in her eye, and wave at her to come and take the soup bowls through to the table. 'Are you really struggling? Maybe a short break will do you good.'

She sighs and picks up the bowls and cutlery, watching while I slide the toasties onto a plate and turn off the machine. 'I'm not good at public speaking, I'll admit. That's part of it.'

***

We talk about other things as we eat. Diana has a fairly busy few weeks of tough legal wrangling coming up, I know, and having a high-pressure speech to deliver immediately afterwards doesn't help. But she normally likes to give me quick summaries of whatever it is she's working on, use me as a bit of a sounding board for her own thoughts, and I quite like the process. I like it that she doesn't seek or need my advice, she just finds the process of telling me about whatever's on her mind helpful in itself. On this occasion, I decide that encouraging her to talk about her work may take her mind off the speech for a few moments – and I tell her to imagine how much more relieved she'll feel once it's all over.

'And I know you'll be great. I can't believe I'm saying this to you of all people, but you really need to have more confidence in yourself, Diana.'

She smiles and chuckles softly. I'm happy that she seems to be cheering up, especially when she looks at me carefully, and reaches over the table to stroke my hand again gently. 'You are lovely, Fiona. I'm lucky to have you.'

***

After lunch, I tell her to summarise what she's trying to say in the speech for me, while we wash up. I figure that doing so will help her decide whether she's on the right track with it. She finishes swirling her hand in the suds and turns off the tap with a sigh, before taking a plate and starting to wash it vigorously.

'Well. I assume that they've asked me because they think my life, my experience, can be used as an example. Like you said, that time we were talking about it.' She pauses and glances at me where I'm leaning my hip on the side, holding the tea towel, waiting to dry the crockery. 'That was the first time we went out. Seems a while ago now. We've come a long way, Fiona.'

I smile at her. 'We have, and it's been wonderful. But don't get distracted.' I flick her hip lightly with the tea towel and shift my leg to rest one foot on top of the other.

She grins and puts the plate in the plastic rack, then deliberately runs her eyes over me as I watch. 'Not even by the sight of you in those jeans?' Her eyes linger on me for a moment, and I like it. She takes another plate to wash. 'Are they new, by the way?'

'No, not particularly.' I start to dry the plate she's already washed. 'But I haven't worn them in a while. They'd got too tight, much to my horror.' I take the second plate off her and dry that. 'Too much cake. That's partly why I started going to the gym.'

'Oh.' She tips the cutlery into the bowl. 'At the time I thought you said it was because you wanted to see me naked in the showers.'

I laugh and shoot her a quick look through my lashes. 'That was part of it. But it doesn't hurt that I can get into these jeans again too.'

She looks at me carefully and plonks the knives in the rack. 'Hmm. They're still quite tight.'

I reach up on tiptoe to put the plates in the cupboard and slightly exaggerate how much I have to stretch, to tease her. 'In a bad way?' I know they fit fine now, and I've always liked them for the way they really suit my figure.

'In a very good way.' She waits for me to rest my weight back on my feet properly and turn towards her, then leans in quickly and kisses me unexpectedly. It's only a short kiss, but her mouth is firm and hot and her tongue flicks against mine quickly. It's incredibly sexy, and I don't even bother to resist getting turned on. She holds my gaze for a moment after the kiss, and her dark brown eyes are intense. She sighs slightly. 'I've been staring at your arse and legs all morning, behind your back.'

'Have you indeed?' I move closer and nuzzle her neck, feeling her body respond to the brush of mine. We kiss again, and this time I pull her tongue fully into my mouth and it lasts for longer.

She breaks off when she realises her hands are dripping soapy water onto my socks. 'Oh. Sorry.'

I grin and bump my hip against her. 'You're making me all wet, Diana.'

She catches her breath and runs her eyes over me again. She lingers on the crotch of my jeans, and I can see she's getting aroused. 'We should finish this.'

I pick up the knives and dry them. 'Hurry up, then.'

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