Smell Of Books

THE MIND

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry,
For being mean.
For being arrogant.
I don't have the love that you wanted.
I don't care as much as you do.

And maybe I don't even have Heart..

Do I?

I remember,
I gave it to the star 🌟
So that he kept shinning in the darkest space of gloomy night.

He walked into the storm and even fought with the lighting.

It's worth it,
they found home.

Our home.

HEART

I remember,
He lived with me and
poured me with the rain of love.

He gave me a new beats everyday,

Taught me how to grow.

Taught me how to stand up for what I wanted,

He willalways be my home 🏠
Home that I've never owned

'till oneday he became tired and old
he was weary
He was clumsy
He was furious about everything..

I don't understand.

I danced
Sang songs and played the music for him.
Entertained him with care , love and jokers.
He still mad.

And I wonder,
Who am I?

Yes.

Maybe he forgot about me, as his gift.
But I'll remember him.
' it will be okay
As long as he is fine. '
I whispered to my soul
To spread the positive vibes within me.
Running through out me.

I saw,
He has a new accompany
that has taught him to be younger, energized and straighten up.
Isn't it beautiful ?
He's greater than he was yesterday.

I saw,
He's shinning brighter than before..
Rougher than the moon
Brighter than the sun
Tougher than the star

I'm confused,
Where am I?

...

I swear,
I was in the house with him a moment ago..

I lost.

I can see him from here,

' Can he sees me?
He has the light.
He probably sees me. '

I put the gold, roses and glorious
from the Mighty Sky
In my jar.

I filled it with joy and laughter.

Love and pleasure.

' He will shining brighter than before after receiving this. '

I put them
Patiently.

I cracked a smile on my face as I realized my hands got cut from the thorns.

' He will take care of this when I'm home, '

I walked onto the road
that he once called it
' The Road of Misery '

The storm spinned me,
Yet my foot still land on the ground.

The lighting kept striking me,
I fell.
I stood up again.

They kept striking me all over again
And again.

And finally,

I gave up.
I give in.

I was down on my knees.
Drpping blood.

But inside me says,

' But you still can crawl. '

I said it to my mind.

' I choose,

To lose my pride.
My sanity.
My power.
My beats..

As long as the new gift safe with me,
I'll be alive. '

I believed in it.

Though I'm dying inside.

Burning.

Fighting to live is all I knew.
I wanted to go home.

I crawled in pain to reach his highest place.

I cried as the thought of coming back home popping in my mind.

This is my home.

Now the door is infront of me,

' Should I scream or knock on the door?
And says,

' I'm home, '

-to be continued

I may not the good poetry and I don't trying to be one.
This is my thoughts,
My heart that I can't express.
I cant explained to myself.

I wrote this late at night
Sorry for the bad grammar..

Again,
This my diary..