'No one will ever love you.'
It was happening again. Gina felt herself being pulled into the spiral of unhappiness that she often found herself in. She looked in the mirror and what she saw disgusted her. ' How could anyone ever love me?' she thought, as she stared at her own reflection.
Her eyes weren't even focussing anymore. She just stared into the mirror. Feeling helpless. Alone. Unwanted. The person she was looking at wasn't someone she knew. It was a shell of a human being.
No one would ever understand what she went through. She often considered the possibility that she was insane.
But the happier days convinced her that her problems were not the reason why the field of psychiatry was created. It was days like today, that she would look into space, wishing she could escape from it all. Live a life of nothingness. With her brain occupied by nothing but fluffy, meaningless thoughts. Living from moment to moment. Her happiness not determined by the moods and behaviour of the self involved human beings around her.
' Alas, the world is not so simple,' she thought, as she slowly began to wash her face and continue her daily routine. The pattern she was forced to follow to fulfill her job as one of the very small pieces in the puzzle of a world around her. She continued to get ready to go to college, dreaming about the life she could have if society did not insist on people earning money to prove their worth. She would move to a silent, uninhabited little part of the world and become one with her surroundings. Alone. Left to absorb every immaculate detail in her isolated habitat.
'Hmmm, it all sounds rosy, but practically not feasible, ' she thought. Her stupid brain wouldnt even let her daydream without bringing practicality into the picture. 'Where will you get food, what about your parents, you'll miss them, how will you entertain yourself, what about your ambitions in life, what about wifi,' the list of cons went on inside her brain, buzzing with useless activity.
'Ah, well, at least I'm alive,' she thought, as she tied her hair into a neat bun and walked out of her humble abode, to face another day and all the bittersweet new memories it would bring her.
