if jungkook was a stereotypical teenage girl pt.1 :')
R A P_L I N E
what is yo name, hotstuff.
juanika: the name is juanika. j-u-a-n-i-k-a you better spell that right or i'll pull up my boyfriend's car into this shabby place.
aight fam so tell us, what is namjelica like?
juanika: oh my god, she my best bitch namjelly, sometimes she emo but most of the time she works it more than google. her brain is like the size of god's dick. how is she so smart goddamn, it makes me wonder if she is the reincarnation of asian jesus. but tbh she is like the inverse john cena version of sleeping beauty, everything she touches, it would prick and break and she aint gettin no sleep after that. also i honestly think she is too desperate for the succ BUT i never said that taha- anyways she a nice chick and yall should date her because she a precious baby who needs lovin and oh my god her fashiON; parfait muah!
what about this beautiful girl named hosaek.
juanika: lord, i love her to death, by the way, you pronounce her name as josé, the "k" is silent because it stands for "lowkey a king". anyways she deserves to be loved but i gotta say she is one craZY bitch, have you seen her room? you can literally film a plant documentary in it and win oscars. it's full of long ass sunflowers and news flash they're not even real, literally paper cutout suns taped on dead flowers and they read: "I'M YOUR ANGEL I'M YOUR HOPE" does she even know they're dead uh- and then this one time i called her up to the pub for some money because she rich as fuck #notagolddigger and she suddenly appeared, came charging at me like a world war uno torpedo and squawking like a fucking ostrich, i almost died of shook that day.
what about yoongee?
juanika: OH. MY. GOD. she like my granny man she is so chill i love her like fam but if you get on her nerves, she can breath into your ears and your ears will dislocate itself and self destruct. one time this one ugly yarnball touched her ass at a club and she bit his hand, and oh dear his hand looks like a cookie cutter now except it ain't cuttin shit. she knows what to spit and what to swallow and i'll tell you this for your own safety, she has won all 99 lawsuits against her without the slightest pinky lift while drinking british tea and 98 of them were her being too parfait. the last one was this one dude named b-foil and he attempted to roast her but she, namboob and hosacks got him cyphered and he was never seen or heard again.
what do you call yo fans
juanika: myars :)
..-u so extra fam
juanika: isn't that how you spell that sexy planet?
you mean M-A-R-S?
juanika: no of course not silly i mean venus.
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guys, thank you so much for 30.3k reads and 1.01k followers, i am so thankful and i really appreciate that you guys recognize me as a source of laughter or somethin iDk but anyways i hope yall got a chuckle out of this and i hope you recognized the members au names LOL i honestly don't even know what i wrote rip
