phil
soft tunes have been overtaking the thoughts in my mind for about twenty minutes now, the embarrassment and frustration leaving my nerves and calming me down. the black bag is full of twigs and dry leaves now, hanging carelessly from one of my hands and i'm humming softly, hoping to escape all that is caught up inside me.
i have been feeling like hell ever since the stupid rappelling session, and i am not even sure if i want to attend dinner. i don't want to see all those people or david and gale or even dan for that matter.
i thought we were getting better, more comfortable around each other after what happened after breakfast but he has proved me wrong yet again. he is the biggest asshole i have ever come across.
when i see the tent in view, i pull my earbuds out of my ears and push my phone inside my pocket, blowing out a puff of air that turns into mist right in front of my mouth. surprisingly enough, i can hear the rustling of feet as soon as i bend over to move the residue of the previous campfire, and soft whistling accompanying it. for a fact i know it's dan, but at this point, i'd rather have it be a burglar or a serial killer.
"hey you throwing up again?" is the first thing dan says when he sees me bent over and i roll my eyes, choosing not to respond to his statement, emptying the black bag and pouring out the dry mess into the fire pit.
"you went to get wood without me?" he seems slightly surprised and i look at him just for a moment before nodding my head. i don't wish to talk to him, but i have no reason to be mad at him either. he is allowed to make new friends and make fun of me just like he used to before we attended this camp.
it's not his fault if i expect something totally irrational out of him.
"why? i mean i could've helped," he takes a few steps towards me, stuffing his hands in his pockets.
"it's fine," i murmur quietly, pouring a little bit of kerosene over the pile and settling the jug down after putting on the cap, bringing out the lighter and hesitantly raising my hand over it. the last time i tried to do this i almost burnt my hand off, but i'd rather burn to death than asking that asshole for help.
"wait, i'll do that, you'll hurt yourself," he volunteers again, moving forward to grab the lighter from my grasp and i just turn slightly to avoid him.
"how does that matter to you? if i hurt myself or if other people hurt me? if you don't care then please stop pretending to, i don't need to you to—" i stop in the middle of my rant and push out a deep breath through my nose, looking away from dan who looks like he is at a loss of words, and i pick up a stick from the ground before lighting it and throwing it into the pile, watching as the liquid slowly sets the leaves ablaze.
"what the hell are you on about? what have i done?" his tone is offended, and i push past him to get inside the tent again.
"that's the point dan," i turn to look at him slightly and he just furrows his eyebrows in question. "you didn't do anything,"
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can u believe i hit 13k followers today im actually shitting everywhere
