Coming Home // Sidemen AU (Minizerk)

2012

Two years missing...

Two years was a strange one. They say the average grieving process after a loved one has passed away is two years. But that was someone who's fate you knew of. That was a part of life that people could understand. Was it hard? Hell yes. But it was something everybody would experience at some point, it was inevitable.

Losing someone in an inexplicable manner however, in a way that didn't give you any closure; that was so much harder to deal with. The mystery was what killed them more than anything. They all seemed to be getting there however, albeit extremely slowly.

JJ and Vik tried to distract themselves as much as possible, and as it turned out, Youtube offered them a sort of lifeline. The content they put out were becoming more creative, they were making more friends in the community and, as a bonus, the money wasn't too bad. Having now wiped his hands of school also, JJ was set on never having a normal job and making his millions on the internet. A lot of people thought he was a bit of a dickhead, maybe he was he often thought, but he didn't really see any other choice, he wasn't good at much else.

Vik was still at school, still juggling YouTube and exams precariously, but always with an incredible spring in his step and positive outlook. If losing Josh had taught him anything, it was that even the best things could be short lived, and he was determined to make the most of every opportunity. Both he and JJ were the only ones who could speak about Josh in the past tense; who didn't mind talking about the good old days with one another. The others will still not as comfortable.

Ethan especially would get very riled up by the two. Telling them to shut their mouths if they ever spoke up about it in his presence. He'd changed a lot too. His skin had definitely thickened, his tongue had sharpened, his mind had become more pessimistic. Gone was the young boy who used to find entertainment in the smallest of things, replacing him was a young man who worked long shifts everyday. He had the benefit of still living at home, meaning he was able to save up a lot of his earnings. What he was saving for though, he didn't quite know.

On the other side of the city Tobi was enjoying university life. To his surprise, he found himself gradually growing up; he'd made a lot of good friends on his course and nights out were always a riot. He still wasn't quite independent yet, and frequently made trips home to his parents house where he'd always be fed the finest homemade food. Often he checked up on Josh's mum. She was...to be expected. She had been admitted to a psychiatric ward in the time that passed, having only been released a few months ago. She was on a steady course downhill however and every day Tobi worried if he was going to get the call that she had finally slipped over the edge.

As far as his old friend went, he didn't mind occasionally talking about him, but only with JJ and Vik. Ethan would start sending death glares the minute Josh's name was brought up and he just felt plain bad talking about him around Simon. The blond boy was never rude or harsh about it, but he would never contribute his own memories and would quickly change the subject if the chance arose.

Talking about growing up, Simon had definitely matured a huge amount since his time volunteering in Nigeria. He'd worked with some amazing kids but had also seen just how small and insignificant his own life really was in the grand scheme of things. He would never forget the day one of the young lads who we worked with, a seven year old boy called Anthony, never turned up. It was well known that the boy's mother was seriously ill and Simon had been sent to check on him. Arriving at the tiny shack - if you could even call it that - he had found the little boy crying by his mother's bedside. She was dying. There was nothing to be done. Medicine was stupidly expensive in that part of the world.

Simon had sat there. Not saying a thing but never leaving the woman or her son's side. He was there with Anthony until his mum took her last dying breath. Strange, up until then he had never seen anyone die before, but there was something almost calming about it. He had stayed and offered what comfort he could to the child until the boy's older siblings arrived home from work, and then he left the family to grieve in peace. That moment had changed him, for the better he hoped, no matter how much it still haunted him.

Josh was still out there. He had to be otherwise Simon wouldn't still be able to feel it in his heart. He knew he sounded crazy but he also knew the difference between seeing someone die in front of his eyes and being told that they were probably dead. JJ would always tell him it was just the uncertainty that was making him doubtful, that Simon was always a "it needs to be seen to be believed" type of guy. Maybe he was, maybe he was just going insane.

But maybe he wasn't. When Vik and JJ ever spoke about Josh in his presence he would tune himself out as much as possible. He didn't mind the memories, he just didn't like that they were talking about Josh in the past. For him, he thought they should be talking about the present.

No, he was not giving up. His friend was still out there and he was not going to stop looking until he had him back.

...

...

...

His life was one of constant fear. Surrounded by darkness for the most part, body struggling desperately to recover from the latest abuse, heart racing overtime when so much as a slightly abnormal sound echoed down to his cold room, if you could call it a room, dread creeping into his heart at the thought of having to go through "it" again.

The loneliness was what really got to him. The days he would sit isolated, curled up in a corner. Sometimes he would imagine he was having full conversations with the boys, even laughing at a few of their dumb jokes, until he would catch himself and stop in fear he was going crazy. He missed them like crazy. Missed his mum too. He worried about her immensely. Were people looking after her? He knew Tobi would, and Simon too, even if he did it in a less indirect way.

He wondered what they were doing. He hoped they were happy and still friends with each other. He hoped that they hadn't thought he had just run off...no, Simon would never allow them to think that. The blond knew him too well.

For most, any glimmer of hope by now would have been extinguished. But if his life had taught him anything so far, it was that he was tougher than he often thought. Dread and fear were part of his daily routine but the hope was still there. He didn't know what it was, but something was telling him that he was not a total lost cause yet.

Sorry for the long gaps between updates but school is taking over!