Bad Things

10. You Might Be Worth It

Shawn didn't know if "like" was the appropriate term to describe why he was there, more like he felt obligated. He didn't figure that would go over too well, so he just nodded.

"That's very good. It's very seldom the teenage father sticks around, but it can make all the difference for the mother, believe me."

Lord. He wished she'd stop saying things like "father" and "mother." He wasn't ready to hear those words in relation to him and Camila yet. There was a lot of time left to get used to it.

"Now, there's one more thing I'm going to do with Camila before she leaves today and—I've already discussed this with her and she has given her okay—if you'd like to come in, you may."

Shawn's head whipped up and he felt his eyes grow wide. There was no way he wanted to see anything that went on in one of those rooms. He'd heard stories. Very wrong, very sick stories.

Dr. Shelly chuckled. "Relax, it's nothing like that."

How the hell did she know what he was thinking?

"I'm going to do what they call an ultrasound. Do you know what that is?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, good." She nodded. "I can't guarantee we'll be able to see much of anything because I only have a functioning abdominal scan today—the machine I'd usually use for sonograms this early is out of commission at the moment. But I'm going to try, at least to make sure everything else is as it should be. I have my theories on what is causing Camila's pain, but there are things I need to check off the list first. An ultrasound can at least rule some things out. And there is a chance, because Camila is so thin, that we may be able to see the baby, even abdominally." She paused. "Is that something you'd like to be a part of?"

Shawn couldn't begin to comprehend what she was saying. It was too soon for this. He'd just found out Camila was pregnant a couple of weeks ago. They couldn't be having scans and looking at babies already, could they? "I don't know. What does Camila want?"

Dr. Shelly took a breath and stood up straight. "I don't know what Camila wants, but can I tell you what I do know?"

"Sure."

"I know that there's a very scared girl in there, a very alone girl. And maybe, just maybe if she knew that the father of her baby was in this thing with her, she could stop being so afraid. Teenage pregnancy isn't just hard because young people aren't equipped to be parents in the traditional sense. It's hard because their bodies aren't ready, their minds aren't ready, their spirits aren't ready. And a lot of the time, teenage mothers don't get and take the care they need, so complications arise. And do you know why they do that? Because they are scared and they are alone." She paused and placed her hand on his arm. "I'm not going to tell you what you should do, but you should know the facts. Camila is a strong girl, there's no question about that. But I think she could be even stronger with you."

Shawn looked down at the pamphlets once more, of the young boys on the covers holding babies. He took in their expressions and saw in every one of their faces what he felt inside: fear, guilt, shame. But he also saw resolution and forgiveness. For themselves. For what they'd done. When he looked up, Dr. Shelly's gaze was glued on his face. But there was no judgment there, no guilt trip. The things she'd said weren't to get him to do what she felt was right, they were to give him the chance to do it himself.