Lucy Snape and the Half-Blood Princess (Book Six)

Destructive Demons

Chapter 29: Destructive Demons 

Of course he could do it. It wasn't hard, he'd managed everything else in his life before this so why couldn't he do something as simple as this? Everyone knew him and they wouldn't dare say anything to him or about him because they knew his reputation. He could do this. He could do this. He could do this. 

The soles of his expensive black leather shoes hit the ground making little noise, but to him the noise echoed in his head as he made his way down the corridor. He was already late and now he'd have to explain it which made it even worse. His heart hammering in his chest made him feel sick and he didn't know how to stop it. 

'Shut up,' he yelled at himself mentally, he was stressing over nothing. He gripped his hand around the strap of the leather satchel he wore, he was surprised it didn't break under his force. 'Look at you, you're such an idiot. Why can't you do this?' 

'I can do it!' He almost screamed back at the voice in the back of his head. 'What am I doing? Deduce it for yourself! I'm walking down this silly corridor and I'm getting there! It's not as though I haven't made the effort!' 

'Look at you, though! You're a nervous wreck! You're going to get in there and throw up all over the floor. Just calm down, you idiot!' 

'I AM CALM!' He screamed down the empty corridor, his voice echoed back and forth, bouncing off the wall and not ceasing until he had actually calmed down. Luckily, no one else was there to hear his outburst of fury. 

His heart began to hammer even harder in his chest again, altering his walking pattern, making it uneven. He shook slightly and tried to pull himself together, his body was no co-operating with his mind which frustrated him more. 

He charged along the viaduct, the wind's icy fingers finding it's way through his hair and slowly messing it up. He pushed open the old doors, ran down the steps and stopped. The door was in front of him. Only the door separated him from that. 

He didn't know if he could do this. He ran a hand through his hair and tucked his shirt in, straightened his tie and changed his facial expression to serious. 'Come on, you good for nothing,' he growled in his head. 'It doesn't take much effort, you'll impress her and you'll be a better person. Just open that stupid door and — ' 

"Sorry I'm late." 

Every single member inside the room turned their heads to face him. In that moment he swore every person in the world frowned upon his actions and he regretted most of his choices in life then and there. Some people wore expressions of shock, some wore frowns and some (and that was only one member) looked happy to see him. 

"Matthew Jarvin!" Slughorn eyed him up and down, he was one of those with the combined look of shock and confusion. Matt ran his hand through his hair again to give himself a small confidence boost. 

"Did Professor Snape tell you that — ?" Matt very nearly stumbled on his own words but didn't. He was suddenly thankful for whatever it was that he didn't get tongue tied. 

"Yes," Slughorn interrupted. "He did indeed. Perhaps if you'd like to join us?" 

Matt slowly made his way over to the group of people and squeezed his way in next to Lucy. She looked up at him with a kind smile, he tried to smile back but he thought it must have looked like a grimace. But whatever he did, it didn't stop Lucy from smiling. She offered her hand out to him secretly by her side and he took it gratefully as they listened to Professor Slughorn. 

Matt breathed a silent sigh of relief and let his heart slow down. He tried to recall how he had gotten into this (mess) situation and eventually he knew just as Slughorn began describing whatever the potion was that was stationed in front of him.