Russian Lullaby (English Translation)

More Grzegorz

There I was...at the airport. And kept imprisoned by a bubbly (supposed-to-be) Polish boy. Yeah, the usual stuff, y'know...that happened to me like...every week?

What the heck was that all about?! I searched for authorized  persons and what did I found??

"Yeeah, and I'm from Gdansk, by the way. That's in Poland as you surely know! That city is so beautiful! It's right beside the sea but it's not the ordinary sea like, you know, the Baltic Sea near Germany or something...Although...Poland's also on shore of the Baltic Sea...Anyways, that beach is so, so, so very gorgeous! Because the sand there is so fine and nearly white and alabaster-like. Do you even know what that is; alabaster?" - two seconds of silence followed and all I wanted to do was to take a pencil and ram it straight into my ears. Just to make him stop! I mean, seriously! How could one be even able to babble around for that long?! Didn't that guy get enough attention as a kid?! Or was it too much attention?! Seriously! You probably might think: "'Ey, he just euphorically shared some good old memories of his home town with you!'

Yeah, yeah...sure thing...if I've told you everything what that little motormouth said, I'd fill a whole book! And it'd most certainly be thicker than a collection of the writings of Shakespeare. That's right! A collection with all writings! But I wasn't even able to get worked up because that guy just continued talking:

"The beach's also pretty great because you can buy some ice cream there! Italian ice or American, it's called like that there. I don't know if it's really made in Italian or American style, either. But it's delicious anyway! Well...the ice cream topping is whirled, similar to soft ice but it's more solid. Also it's divided vertically in the middle, so that the ice cream topping has two sides; one side is white and the other has a different color...well, depending on the taste. And there are sooooo many tastes, you know? Unfortunately, you don't always find an ice cream cart which offers various tastes...But when you do, then; my oh my! Soooooooou, what's avaible any-any-anytime is vanilla. Then comes chocolate. After that strawberry and if you really are a lucky one, then you'll also find someone who sells that ice cream with apple taste! Do you actually know Polish waffles?"

At that moment, I wanted to grab his shoulders, shake them and yell at him: 'Stop it already!!!', but in the last second, just before I was about to lose my mind completely, he said one thing that triggered something inside of me...yeah, something what actually affected me deeply somehow.

"But you know what I like the most? At the beach, they also sell sunflowers! Actually, just the heads because they're only supposed for picking their seeds and eat them but...later, when everyone has eaten their seeds, then the whole beach is full of sunflowers."

He glanced at me and I don't know what kind of look I had on my eyes but it must've been different from usual because Grzegorz seemed to be quiet surprised and started to smile at me:

"Do you like sunflowers well?"

I don't remember exactly what passed through my thoughts back then. But I remember me nodding quietly at his question. Yes, sunflowers are pretty great. I do like them well.

In that moment, I started to relax a bit and thought of the pleasant sunflower fields in Russia. But my moment was destroyed by the further chatter of that weird guy.

"Hee hee, yeah, sunflowers are pretty super."

To my surprise, Grzegorz didn't say it in his usual hyper manner.

"Hm, but,speaking of which...what are you actually doing here?", was he serious?

But well, I was too tired and totally ran out of steam...and I just hadn't any energy left. So I just began telling him:

"I applied for some kind of project...one that's supposed to promote and support teens about their creative skills. It's called APH for short, I think...

"APH?!", Grzegorz asked stunned. I wondered why. Maybe he heard of it either? Unknowing, I nodded my head.

"Waah! That's awesome! I'm a participant, too!"

I was shocked. Simply shocked. I wasn't even able to say anything else than: "What?"

"Yes! APH, here in Vancouver. So you are that boy from...Wait!"

Still totally shattered I stumbled: "Y-yes?"

"You aren't a Russian! Russians don't look like that!"

I awoke again from my paralyzed phase.

"Of course I am a Russian."

"No, no, I don't think so."

"So you're calling me a liar?"

"That's not what I meant, but still. I can't imagine that you are."

"You don't?"

"Nope."

"And why not?" (Why do I even bother to ask?)

"That's impossible!"

"Nothing's impossible!", slowly I began to thaw but the sentence that Polish Teenie said next, let me freeze again:

"You're way too pretty for a Russian!"

"...What..?"

"Yeah, Russians aren't that pretty! They have big, croocked noses. Yours is too straight!"

"...Okay...first of all; not all Russians are ugly. Second of all, a man's never pretty but handsome. Mark this well. And thirdly: what kind of worldview do you actually have?!"

"But..."

"What?! What 'but'?!"

"Your...your chin..."

"What? What's with my chin?!"

"It is...too slender to belong to a Russians's face..."

Inwardly, I face palmed myself. That boy...was unbelievable. With the last of my strength, I covered the lower part of my face with my hand. Immediate screaming.

"Maaaaaaaaaaan! You indeed are a Russian!

I sighed. I couldn't believe I was going to come in an institution with that guy. The way he behaved himself, I'd rather tell he belonged to a very different kind of institution.

Once more, I sighed silently and asked with a more calm tone: "Say, where were you all the time? I certainly searched at the whole airport for you guys."

"Oh, yeah, well that's because: We went to the toilets!"

"....Everyone...at once...?"

"Hm, yeah, the guardians told us to go so that the driver wouldn't have to stop every two minutes. You have no idea how diuretic the coffee, the stewarts in the plane sell, is.

I kept quiet.

...But not everything about Grzegorz was annoying. For instance, he guided me to the rest of the participants who already waited for us. Soon I'd be able to sleep finally.