Children of Ender (Temporary Hiatus!)

Chapter 2 - Nightmares

Footsteps. They grew closer and closer.

People- running. Running from what?

Screaming- all I could hear was screaming... all around me.

People are being pulled into the sky- being taken by the Witherstorm. My friends are plucked up one by one, but I still have a chance. I can save them.

I run, calling out their names, reaching my hands out toward them. They stretch toward me but, before I can get there, they're already gone. The storm has already taken them and I can't bring them back. They're gone. All of them.

All except....

"Jesse!"

It was her. I knew that voice anywhere. I wouldn't let her get taken. Not her.

"Petra- I'm coming- hold on!"

I ran. I moved as fast as my legs would take me. The invisible force that usually pushed me back wasn't there, and I pelted at full sprint toward her.

Then I heard another sound. A sound I grew ever familiar with. The sound of my best friend.

"Reuben?!" I spun on my heels, looking around. Someone watching me from a distance would've surely thought I was insane.

But I wasn't.

There he was. He was getting pulled up into the storm too. But then, another voice called out for me.

"Jesse- help me!"

"Petra..." I breathed. I couldn't save them both.

Why couldn't I save them both?!

"Oh, Notch, please...don't make me choose!"

I had to. I knew I had to. But I was so overcome with indecision that I couldn't take it. I fell onto my knees, holding my head and letting out a scream that burned my throat and made my lungs ache. The noise around me ceased, and I looked up confused.

"Oh...no."

I was in the middle of not one, but three Witherstorms. And there she was.

"Petra..."

She turned, and I felt my heart drop into my stomach.

"Who's....Petra?"

The confusion in her voice killed me. I did this. I didn't save her. I chose another over her. I chose Gabriel of all people, over her! Sure, Gabriel was a hero and a warrior, but he turned out to be a fraud! Petra was my friend!

"No....no, Notch, please no..." I was standing again, and felt myself stumbling backwards, then I was falling. Falling endlessly.

I looked down, then gasped.

"Reuben!"

I saw him. I saw him fall. I couldn't save him either. And here I was yet again. Watching him fall to his death.

I closed my eyes and awaited the sound. That horrible, horrible sound of bones crunching and snapping against hard stone.

I couldn't save him.

No, Jesse. You could have saved him. But you didn't. You didn't save him.

Jesse jumped out of her sleep, gasping for air and clutching at her chest with tears pouring down her cheeks. Her head spun in all different directions, trying to put things together to figure out where she was, but she was too overcome with panic to identify anything.

Petra, who had woken up a while ago thanks to Jesse's tossing and turning, was up and out of her bed in an instant, hurrying over to Jesse's side. "Jesse- Jesse, hey! Look at me- you're okay!"

Jesse turned to face her, emerald green eyes puffy and red from crying in her sleep. Recognition flashed through them for a second, and Jesse flung herself into the redhead's arms, sobbing,"Petra- you're alive- you remember- thank Notch you remember!"

Petra was surprised and nearly toppled right over, but caught her balance and hurried to wrap her arms around the smaller girl. "I'm alright Jesse- we're both okay. Just breathe." She tried to put on the most comforting voice she could muster, but this wasn't something Petra had to do often...and if she was entirely honest, she wasn't sure exactly how she knew what she was doing would help to calm Jesse down.

Jesse just pushed her face into the crook of Petra's neck, still sobbing quietly and mumbling out several mishmashed words that didn't make much sense put together. However, Petra could pick out a few to get the gist of exactly what her nightmare was about.

'Reuben. She had to choose....she had to choose again. Me or Gabriel...Reuben or the world.'

Petra honestly didn't want to think about how hard it must have been...

After a while, Jesse had somewhat calmed down and pulled back, rubbing her eyes and wiping away some stray tears. "I-I'm sorry..." she mumbled out, sniffling and staring at the sheets.

"Sorry? Sorry for what?" Petra asked, confused, tilting her head.

Jesse would normally love Petra's little puppy head tilt, but this time, she couldn't bring herself to enjoy it.

"For choosing Gabriel...for letting you be taken...for breaking down...for not being good enough."

Petra was taken aback. She was at a near complete loss for words.

'After everything you've done, all the people you saved, you're still blaming yourself? You really think you aren't good enough?!'

"Jesse..."

"Don't." Jesse's voice was hostile, and had a very 'don't try to argue with me' edge to it. "I'm so tired of people telling me I'm not good enough, then when I finally agree, they snap back at me and say I'm begging for attention or that I'm just trying to justify not being able to save..." Her voice trailed off and she bit her lip, tears threatening to fall again.

"Oh, Jesse...." Petra's heart was breaking. Jesse was her best friend, and seeing her like this...in so much pain...she couldn't take it. She pulled the smaller girl into another embrace, stroking her hair. "You are so much more than good enough. I wouldn't be here without you, okay? You can't always save everyone, but those who you have saved...like me...will never forget it."

'If I'm so much more than good enough, why did you choose him?' Jesse thought bitterly, then sighed, relaxing into Petra's hold and wrapping her arms around the redhead's waist.

They stayed like that for what felt like hours, but Jesse was sure it was only a few minutes. Soon enough, Petra was starting to feel fatigued and tired again, and gently pulled away.

"I'm going to go back to sleep, okay?"

Jesse panicked and clung onto her arm,"W-Wait-!"

Petra blinked at her.

She cleared her throat and let go, rubbing behind her neck,"Could...could you stay with me? Just..at least until I fall asleep. I don't think I'll be able to otherwise.."

Petra understood. She nodded and once Jesse moved over, crawled into bed beside her. The brunette immediately wormed her way into Petra's arms again, cuddling up into her side. Petra didn't mind, of course. Jesse was scared. When you were scared, you clung onto whoever was closest to you.

That was her rationalization of it at least.

Slowly but surely, they both fell asleep once more.

In the weeks that passed, Jesse's nightmares never ceased.

Every time she had them Petra would be awoken by her cries, and every time she had them Petra would be there. She would be there to comfort her, to hold her, to ensure she was safe. To make her feel safe.

That was, at least, until she wasn't there. And that was the time Jesse needed her the most.