The monotone teacher drones on with her lesson , the trouble maker in the back taps his pencil to a beat. My mind wonders in its own little playground. I've found it troublesome to wake up this morning, worse than usual. I've been feeling so sad I just don't want to do anything my motivation is so low I don't even feel like talking sometimes. I don't want to work I don't want to get older I just want my world to stand still.
Yesterday I felt this way too but I somehow trudged my feet to the bus stop. My heart sinks whenever I think about the next day I'll have to go through this shit all over again. Just repeating the same tasks over and over again. A little voice in my head tells me to scream at the top of my lungs just to get in trouble. To feel a rush. But I'm just the girl in the backseat of the world around her , I must never have the needs to feel that rush they must think. I think everyone thrives for that rush, Maybe it's just me. The period ends I walk to my next class trying to blend in with the crowds of people.
My day marches on. Finally I'm in fourth period, lunch. I really want to go home I think to myself, I want to do nothing anymore, I just need to feel that rush again. I get up my mind is set to what I'm about to do. I pick up my books and walk out of the lunch room with the people I sit with staring at me. I look around nonchalantly looking for any security guards but none are in sight. My body floats to the door my heart starts to race , I put my hand on the door. Half of me wishes it would be locked despite my efforts but the other half wants it to be open. I push ,my heart sinks as the door slowly opens.
I rush out of the building and run across the side of building without hesitation and without considering the classroom windows I was running by. I'm swearing under my breath now , I throw my books over the fence ,after I climb the fence and jump it myself. My heart feels like it's gonna come out of my chest I'm not thinking clearly anymore. I run and take off into the beautiful woods. Orange, red, and yellow leaves all around me I see no end to this new world . I look behind me , I've come too far to back out now. I run and run into the woods till I hear a female voice tell "get back here your gonna be in big trouble". I drop to the floor and see a security guard by the fence.
