Game Theory × NH

062 | samarium

"I didn't expect you to be here," I said softly. "That's what you do, isn't it? After you get what you want, you leave the next morning without another word."

The hurt in his eyes was evident, but I knew I was right. I came to the conclusion a while ago that Niall and Bradley were two totally different people, but they were also very similar in some aspects. On more than one occasion, I had woken up in an empty bed after doing everything Bradley had told me to do the night before. I knew these types of people like the back of my hand. No emotions and no commitment. That was the point.

Maybe it was because our generation was always looking for more, looking for the quickest and easiest way out of a problem. Relationships are hard and take time and energy. We need things done fast and efficiently. One-night-stands take little time, little energy, and next to no emotional investment.

But Niall was still in my bed even after he was awake, and from the stack of Friends DVDs on the bedside table, he wasn't planning on leaving any time soon.

"You're right, that's what I do," Niall confirmed as he ran a hand through his hair. "One-night stands leave me feeling empty and cynical. It's not even fun sexually, but I do it because it's... it's just a way to avoid commitment, to feel emotionless. That's it."

Then his eyes trailed down my body. It wasn't a lusty look, like he wanted to do everything he did to me last night all over again, but he was looking at me like he honest to God couldn't believe I was actually there lying next to him.

"But you make me feel something, Lynn," he continued, his voice deep and raspy. "Do you know how long it's been since I've really felt anything? Here you come, strolling around here like you own the place, and I've got this fire in my chest as soon as I see you. It's absolutely horrifying, knowing that you can do that to me, but it's beautiful and I wouldn't trade it for anything."

I knew what he was talking about, of course. I'd felt it too. That flame he carried with him, lighting me on fire with a single look.

"You don't even know what kind of effect you have on people. You remind everyone around you that passion is real. You either love or you hate - it's always a hundred percent with you. You're human, and you're alive, and you remind other people that they're alive. That's why I haven't left. I'm afraid that will go away once I step out the door."

My head was spinning. His comment was so out of character, so far from what I knew of him, I just stared at him, searching his eyes for something that I was missing. My brain formulated no thoughts, but that didn't stop me from rolling over so I was hovering over him. Monica and Ross's voice was distantly heard over my pounding heartbeat, but the background noise morphed together as I slowly bent down and kissed him.

I'd like to think that the action was completely moved by my newly awakened mind, but deep down I knew that what I was feeling was far from my tranquil sleep. It was pure affection. No one had ever said something so nice to me before. And that it was from Niall Horan, the Irish boy who once refused to pass me the soccer ball, was on a whole new level.

I pulled away from him slightly, suddenly feeling insecure. But Niall's big hands pushed me back down on top of him before I could get very far.

"Aren't I heavy?" I asked.

Niall smirked, his lips brushing mine. "My ideal body weight is you on top of me."

I laughed as he kissed me again, his lips molding with mine. It wasn't a forceful kiss, but the intoxication level of it was enough to get me drunk. Our legs were tangled together and his hand was in my hair. The fact that I was still completely naked didn't even bother me.