cant take it on my own (joshler)

introduction, part 3

Josh drops the pencil. He's shaking too hard.

Somehow, realizing the word in his mind and in writing makes what happened all too real.

"Okay." Tyler says quietly. "Can you come with me? I think you should eat something."

Josh nods. Tyler stands up and holds out his hand.

Josh takes it faster than the first time, but it's still a few moments before he trusts himself to not shake too hard.

He grabs the water bottle as he stands up.

Pete is standing by the door. Josh stares at him as Tyler leads him out into the hallway.

Pete nods and give Josh a slight smile.

Josh nods back.

Tyler takes Josh into a room with a few other officers and a detective. Josh suddenly becomes hyper aware of how he looks, and shrinks back as soon as eyes land on him.

"Hey, don't worry." Tyler's calming voice cuts through a fog in Josh's brain. "You'll be fine."

Eyes turn away from Josh. He can breathe again.

Tyler leads Josh over to a vending machine. Josh pushes up his sleeves to rub at his wrists.

"So." Josh flinches at the sudden voice. "This is Josh."

Tyler casts a glance over at Josh. He points at a bag of chips.

"Yes, it is." Tyler says, pulling coins out of his pocket and slotting them into the machine. "What do you want, Ross."

The anger in Tyler's voice makes Josh shy away slightly, and his grip on Tyler's hand to loosen.

"You finally found the lost cause, huh? I didn't know you had it in you."

Tyler's body goes rigid for a moment before he punches in the numbers with more force than is necessary.

"What happened to your throat, lost cause?" Fingers touch the bruises on Josh's neck, and he flinches hard and lashes out, fingernails digging into Ross's arm and his hand is wrenched away.

Ross yelps and pulls his arm out of Josh's grip. "Holy shit, he broke the skin! Little shit!"

Josh shies away, pressing himself into Tyler and squeezing his eyes shut. He's going to get in trouble, he's going to get used, he's-

"George Ryan Ross, you will not speak that way to him. You will not touch him. You will not make any comments on his appearance." Tyler's voice is filled with a cold fury. Josh presses his face into Tyler's shoulder. "Is that clear?"

Ross grumbles something that Josh can't hear through a static in his ears.

Josh stays like that for a few minutes, before raising his head. His cheeks are a faint red. He mouths the word sorry.

"It's okay, it wasn't your fault." Tyler says. He bends down and pulls the bag of chips out of the vending machine.

The two sit down together at a table. Across from Josh is a TV that's switched to a news channel. The broadcast is live, and the person onscreen is talking about a fire in California.

Josh eats out of the bag mechanically.

"Hey, babe." Footsteps come slowly down the stairs.

Josh flinches at the pet name and looks up. He hasn't slept since the last time he was down to bring food and water, and it shows in the bags under his eyes.