Ask him if he's an albino.
If he denies it, claim that his eyes and hair are a dead giveaway.
Assume that Germany is in fact his older brother, instead of the other way around.
Tell him that he's too arrogant.
Claim that Germany is tired of having him around.
Call him 'lazy'.
Tell him that he's obsolete.
Tell him that the whole world hates him and wants him gone.
Treat him like a young child.
Make sure that he misses a day when it comes to writing his diary entries.
Steal some of the entries from his library at random.
Mess up his collection of journals.
Claim that Frederick II was anything but a great leader.
Point out that Frederick II was actually a Francophile who hated the German language.
Every time he misbehaves, tell him that 'Old Fritz' is still watching.
Tell him that Russia is coming for a visit.
Overuse the word 'awesome' and claim that you're simply imitating his way of speech.
Force feed him some of England's cooking.
Ask him to come to your house to do some cleaning. Whenever he finishes a room, mess it up again so that he won't be able to leave.
Curse God in his presence.
Ask whether he prefers Hungary as a male or a female.
Accuse him of being a pervert who eyes her up.
Ask him if he has feelings for Hungary.
Tell him that you saw Austria and Hungary on a date together.
Throw a bible at his head.
Tell him to get a life.
Bring up the Battle of Grunwald, and rub it in his face that he was defeated by Poland and Lithuania.
Ask if he was ever abusive to Germany and America.
Say the word 'mark' whenever you can.
Point at him and yell: "Forever alone!"
Inform him that most of Silesia is now in Poland.
Claim that Austria is more intelligent, talented or gifted than him.
Threaten to cook his pet bird for dinner.
Deprive him of beer.
Start a conversation with him about life and death.
In an ominous voice, tell him that his time is running out.
Tell him that he's outlived his usefulness.
Claim that you can see the Grim Reaper standing behind him.
Accuse him of being a Nazi.
Ask him what really happened to Old Prussia.
Ask him if he actually married Brandenburg.
Refer to him as a barbarian.
Ask him if he's actually undead or a ghost.
Tell him that he's the exact opposite of all that is manly.
Blame him for everything Germany has done wrong.
Tell him that fighting is all he'll ever be good for.
Speak to him in an overly exaggerated German accent.
Ask him if he can speak Prussian.
Tell any East German joke that involves bananas or Trabants.
Hack into and sabotage his blog.
