How Hate Changed Her

Before it went bad

A mixture of saliva and fruit punch came flying out of my mouth in probably what was the best spit take ever.

Ultimately ending up all over my girlfriend, Fiona.

But before I share her fury with you, I should probably tell you why I spat the contents of my mouth at her.

Two minutes prior, I sat down with a burger and fries across my wonderful girlfriend Fiona, and next to me was my brother, Mike.

Now, Mike is known for saying some pretty crazy and stupid stuff, but it still shocks me every time. Just as my butt hit the seat, Mike goes,

"Hey did you know this chick Lisa Sparxx? Yeah she's this famous pornstar who broke this world record, yeah, she sucked and fucked 300 men in a day back in twenty 'oh four."

And thus, my fresh swig of fruit punch went rocketing into Fiona as a result of my surprise.

She screamed and sprang from the table with her little fists clenched and her face twisted into one of immeasurable fury. She opened her mouth, most likely to unleash every slur she knows upon me, but before she could say anything I figured I'm already dead, so why not have a little fun?

"You're sexy when you're mad baby."

"WALTER JAY OLIVER I'M—"

"Geez babe you're already so wet for me and  you're screaming my name? I haven't even touched you yet!" I tease, dabbing a little at her face with a napkin.

She raised her hand and slapped me, which was expected, before snatching up her purse and making her way towards the door.

I catch her by the arm before she makes it completely out the door, swallowing the urge to lick the fruit punch off my hand.

"Wait, wait, c'mon  I know you're pissed and you totally have a right to be. I just want you to know I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to spit on you... I'll make it up to you at the party, I promise!" I apologized, sinking to one knee knowing she's a sucker for dramatic displays of affection.

At least I thought she was.

You know how she reacted?

She SCOFFED.

"Skh, yeah right! And you can forget about seeing me at that party. In fact you can forget about ever seeing me ever  again 'cause we're over!" She seethed, flipping her wet hair over her shoulder and storming out of the restaurant.

I sat dumbfounded still on one knee. There were so many emotions racing through my head that I didn't know what to think and what not to think.

I felt really sad that she'd dumped me after our strong three years of relationship.

I felt kinda pissed she reacted so wildly over something like this, I mean we've gotten each other way messier than that, like that food fight we started in Golden Corral.

I was angry at myself for letting her go.

But in a messed up way, I was kind of relieved because I had recently been told I was one over the limit of people I was allowed to have. If I hadn't booted someone off the guest list and soon my parents wouldn't let me throw the party, so I guess some  good came out of this.

A firm hand clasped down on my shoulder.

"Sorry about that man. Didn't really think that one through."

I stood up and turned away for a split second to blink the shock off my face.

"Pft, sorry about what? She was lame anyway." I lied through my teeth. Of course I couldn't let someone know how much I cared that she broke up with me, my aloof cool guy status would be obliterated!