Chapter 18
In the past week, I have gone on three dates with Sean. I haven’t talked to Kade about him little show up escapade and I do not intend to in order to avoid any more issues between the two of us. We haven’t been talking as regularly as I anticipated but I guess I have been too preoccupied with Sean to give the situation too much thought.
I am getting ready for what is about to be my fourth date with Sean and I am strangely nervous. I usually am completely calm before our dates but I have a weird feeling in my stomach this time and I am trying to distract myself from it.
I slide to wire brush through my tangled hair and apply my usual minimal makeup of a sheer light pink lip gloss and some mascara through my lashes. I then slip into a short grey cotton dress and denim jacket. I notice that I have been pacing back and forth in the mirror for the past 3 minutes.
I compose myself and slip into a pair of black converse high tops and begin to descend the staircase to wait for Sean. I sit in the front room on the leather couch by the large window that lets you see all of the yard and street in front of my house.
I begin to feel slightly sick as I lightly chew on the tips of my manicured nails. Sean’s car quickly pulls up to the front of my house as my phone vibrates with a text from him saying he is here.
I slip out the front door and jaunt through my large lawn into Sean’s car, sliding into the passenger seat. Sean’s blonde hair is scruffy across his head but still manages to look perfect. He’s wearing a regular grey crewneck tee-shirt and a pair of well fit black jeans and off white vans.
“You look good” He smiles as he begins to drive down my suburban street.
“Thanks.” I give an awkward response and I don’t understand why I feel so uncomfortable. I begin to wonder if he notices how weird I am being.
I can’t shake the feeling that something is going to happen today, but I don’t know what it is and I don’t know why I feel it. I just know that it’s going to happen.
I try to ignore my intense hunch as Sean and I converse about random pointless things on our way to our lunch. I love the way Sean gets so into a conversation and the faces he makes when he tells stories and I begin to space out thinking about how animated Kade is when he talks. Kade always feels so strongly about everything he talks about and gets so into the conversation even if it is the most pointless topic.
I suddenly realize that I’m not listening to Sean and I zone back in to whatever he was saying. I only catch the end of his sentence.
“…don’t you think?” He says unknowingly that I have no clue what he just said.
“Yeah, I think so.” I stutter, hoping that it was in fact the right response to our conversation.
Sean doesn’t seem to notice my zone out and continues the conversation, in which I try my best to keep attentive to. Eventually we arrive at the small restaurant and are seated at a small booth. It’s a very small place at the end of town with baby blue walls and simple diner look to it. A blubbery waitress takes our orders and leaves Sean and I to talk.
“So what number date is this?” He asks slightly awkward.
“Umm… I think number four… right?” I ask even more uncomfortably than he does.
“So,” he begins, “I really like you Cam, and I’ve been thinking about it a little lately and I think we should make things, you know, official…?”
Is this the thing I was thinking about all day? Do I want Sean and I to be official? Many thoughts run through my mind but the one that seems to keep reoccurring to pop up into my brain is the feeling that I am betraying Kade. I know it is ridiculous but it is a thought I can’t help, so I begin to rationalize with myself.
Kade has a girlfriend, he wasn’t thinking of me when he got with Alyssa, so why is this such a complicated decision for me to make? I like Sean. I think a lot but I’m not sure.
My thoughts are interrupted by Sean asking “we don’t have to be, it’s just a thought…”
I suddenly realize how long it has been since I have said anything and I begin to feel guilty and embarrassed.
“No, I’m sorry, I was just thinking…” I ramble, “Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend.” I giggle softly to lighten the tension.
Sean gives out a relieved chuckle. “Well okay then. Cool.” He pulls a crooked smirk and we finish our lunch.
Sean gives me a quick kiss as I get out of his car and walk up the driveway to my front door. I grab a water bottle from the fridge and retreat back down to my room. I settle onto my bed and within 30 minutes of watching reruns of old 90’s tv shows my phone starts having seizures of vibrations next to me.
“Hello?” I answer.
“Come out side.” Kade’s angry voice echoes through the phone line.
I hang up and do as directed and head out to the front of my house. I am greeted by Kade’s Camaro parked in front of me with Kade inside of it.
“Get in.” He says sharply.
I choose not to argue with the angry boy and climb into the passenger seat and buckle my seat belt. Right as the buckle snaps, the cars is hurdled forward and we are speeding down my street.
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Sorry it's been forever guys. School is kicking my ass. Thanks for the patience. Keep reading(:
