luahan perasaan

igneel.

Kenapa?

Kenapa dye xckp awal2 yg dye dh kawen?

Kenapa dye tipu aku?

Aku dh tanye awal2 en.

"kau ade gf x?" aku tanye. Dye kate x.

Jadi aku macam ni la. Kurang fangirling.

Tapi aku baca jugak fanfiction.

For fuck's sake, cakap la awal2 yang kau dah kawen!

Nape tak jujur?

Aku dh kate en, kalo ko tak single, aku lagi nk ship kau ngan girlfriend kau. Eh tak, BINI kau.

Aku rasa dye untung dapat suami macam kau.

Eh jap.

Kau baru je 18 kan?

Kau masih belajar lagi ni.

Macam mana kau menyara bini kau? Soalan ni pun dari najwa.

Takpelah. Aku abaikan tu kejap.

Aku rasa bini kau tu baik. Dye tau menasihati suami dye tu. Kau.

Dye nasihat kau supaya tak bermain dengan perasaan budak kecik.

Aku faham yang kau tak nak aku bersedih.

Tapi, kalau nak macam tu, kau kene jujur bro!

Bukan nipu kata single sedangkan kau dh berkahwin.

Kirim salam kat bini kau. Cakap yang aku nak dye jage kau baik2.

Aku sayang kau. Tapi aku lebih rela tinggalkan kau demi dye. Bini kau.

Aku nak tinggalkan kau demi dunia aku. Dunia yang huru-hara gembira ni.

Kau orang pertama yang buat aku menangis teruk selepas mak bapak aku.

Bukan apa,...takpelah. Jangan kacau bahagian tu. Satu hari nanti kau akn fikirlah, kut.

Betul cakap mira. Sejak kau terima aku, hidup aku gembira sangat.

Walaupun aku xbyk sembang ngan kau.

Honestly, you ruined Green Day for me.

'Still Breathing' always makes me think of you.

My head's above the rain and roses
Making my way away
My way to you

These are the words that reminds me of you.

After our seperation, I didn't have the happy feeling I always do when I listen to this song.

It's probably because of you.

I'm sorry.

I tried to calm myself down by listening to songs about politics.

I listen to Anti-Flag. Yea.

Okei.

Kau hilangkan semangat aku untuk kahwin.

Sebenarnya aku nak tiga orang anak, seorang lelaki, sulung dan kembar lelaki dan perempuan sebagai adik2nya.

Sejak itu, aku tidak mahu berkawhwin.

Love is hopeless.

Unless you're cool enough for guys.

By that, I mean that I never had true love. I actually never had this feeling.

I never felt true love.

I thought it was true love.

It's not, actually.

It's not.

Not even close to 'love'.

I don't believe in love.

I should stand alone in my own world.

At some times, I will need help by my friends.

Why am I not saying 'family'?

Because they never seem to support me with my personal choices.

They don't place me into the place they want me to be.

But I have feelings.

I'm sensitive.

I also have mental disorders like anxiety.

Depression.

Obsessive compulsive disorder.

Short term memory loss.

People used to bully me.

Verbal bullying.

Thanks to Allah and my friends, I'm still alive. Breathing.

I would be dead right now if they weren't there.

Well, good luck with your pile of shit.

Psh, I don't care.

Goodbye my friend.