"Hello?" Pt. 2

Cursed

"She has this weird habit of staring at me while I'm sleeping in the morning," I find myself telling Elias. "And she has way too much clutter for my liking. Let's not even talk about certain accents in the house! But, yes, living with Sophie is all I thought it would be and even more so on top of that. The truth is, the only reason I know that she stares at me in the morning is because for at least half an hour before she wakes up, I've been staring at her and I have to pretend to be asleep. I just find it hard to believe that she's there, next to me, and that she'll continue to be there, next to me, for many more years to come. You're married, you know how it goes."

Silence greeted my comment and it wasn't the friendly silence that would usually exist between Elias and me. Elias shifted in his chair and moved his wine glass closer to his lips, ignoring my questioning stare, until he had no choice but to speak. "It's weird between Jenna and I," he quietly says, looking over to the door to make sure that we weren't about to be interrupted any time soon. "It's just... when we first got together we were in our early twenties and we were hot and heavy and we'd have sex non-stop. Now, we're married, in our early thirties, and on Saturday evenings we're sitting on opposite sides of the couch, separated by our daughter and our dog. Are you supposed to be like that two weeks into a marriage?"

"You're not happy?" I enquire.

"No, I'm happy," Elias was quick to confirm. "I like living under one roof as a family instead of having to spend an hour texting back and forth just so that I could pick my kid up from school. I like being the family unit."

I frown. "Then what's the problem? Look, what you need to realise is that you and Jenna have this really long history and you're basically doing things backwards. You date, you get married, you have kids. That's how it traditionally goes. Except, in this case, you casually screwed, got pregnant, and then got married. What you're missing is the dating phase. You and your wife need to date."

"Date?" Elias looked terrified at my suggestion, going so far as to gulp down the entire content of his drink before he was able to speak again. "I cannot date my wife. I mean, where would I take her? What would we do? No, I don't do dates."

Elias was the worst amongst my friends and me to date. Michael could plan a date with his eyes closed and he would be at ease throughout, whereas Fletch was a pro at dating. Granted, he only ever did first dates, but he'd done so many that he was practically an expert. I, meanwhile, am a romantic and could come up with a hundred and one suggestions, all of which any woman with a sane mind would love. 

Elias, however, was hopeless. He was awkward and nervous whenever he was on a date and his version of romance was to take a woman to McDonald's. 

"Look, the guys and I will help you with this," I promise him. I fill his glass with more red wine. "Even Sophie will help. She loves all that stuff."

"No!" Elias protested loudly. Catching himself, he cleared his throat and lowered his voice. "I can't have Sophie knowing that I'm practically useless with planning dates. She'll go and tell Jenna and then where will we be? Since their girly trip to Paris those women have become best buds! No, no Sophie on this."

"No Sophie on what?" Speak of the Angel and she will appear.

Looking panicked, Elias looked at me to help him dig himself out of his predicament. Luckily, as his best friend, I had his back on this. "My Stag Party," I falsely explain. "We were discussing what we could do and I thought you may have a suggestion or two but Elias thinks it's best that you don't know what we're getting up to."

Sophie shrugs." As long as there's no strippers and that Fletch guy isn't organising it, you can do whatever you want."

"Oh, that reminds me," Jenna perked up slightly. "We need to think of Hen Party ideas. So, we were thinking..."

As the women started discussing various ideas on how to spend the last few days of Sophie's freedom, Elias and I shared a look that both said, 'That was a lucky escape' and 'What Hell are we in now?'

Thankfully, despite what Sophie may have thought previously, we did have enough wine to see us through this afternoon, and Elias and I would know. We drank the lot while trying to figure out what curse had been put on us that we had to sit here and endure talk about Ann Summers Parties.

A/N

OK, so my computer crashed when I was on 1279 words and I had to continue on my phone. I hate writing on my phone! So I cut the chapter short.

Stag/Hen Party= Bachelor/Bachelorette Party

Ann Summers= A store in the UK that sells lingerie and um... Bedroom accessories of the adult variety.

I think that's all the Britishisms in this update!

Sarah xx