二七五 (275)

PROLOGUE

It was there. Always there

Visions of the prolonged incident that carried until the day 7 year olds instead of coloring books they were coloring their bodies. Kisses went from recieved by mothers and fathers were now for strangers whom we pressume to cherish us in their lives. Instead of piles of paper for paper planes, we wanted stacks of cash to buy an actual plane.

It still haunts, it sends shivers, creeps and nightmares. But it's ironic,It was an actual dream. What I thought was just manipulation that our mind played, became real and I was the game piece. Unwilling, obedient and powerless.

'He's just a man,' they say, 'you deserve better than him.' They assume, they predict and they cluelessy say it out loud. Hands clenched together, eyes shooting fires, heart thumping and breathing erratic. No, he isn't just a guy. He's different, he's what I need, he's the one I see everynight, the one I need to see when I wake up, the one who doesn't make me fake a smile.

No, no crying, no regretting, no flashbacks and no reminiscing. Our minds tell us over and over again but who are we? We are humans, the truth behind a denial or a protest is truth, if not, an irony. We always say we won't but we end up doing so.

And now, tears falling like niagra falls and the heart, pity to that poor life giver. Shredded, crushed, stabbed, broken and smashed to pieces. No, it wasn't true, it's all pure literature. Hearts don't go through that much damage and still keep us alive, but the accuracy to relate to the feeling is perfect.

All was in the past, hurt, betrayed, manipulated, victimised. But the longing feeling was strong, the need for their presence was strong, imagination and illusions couldn't satisfy the empty space left after the open burning. But why?

Why was the need of someone whom hurted us still lingered in us?

Simple, the heart wants what It wants.

And this heart,

It screamed,

Cried,

Called,

Wished,

Hoped,

And needed him.

275..