Chasing Cecilia

CHAPTER 28

Cecilia:

It was christmas eve and the snow was still falling heavily outside. A huge fir tree had been erected in the corner of the hall and had been decorated with glass ornaments, candles, sweets and small chains of metal stars that wrapped around the width of the tree. Mistletoe and holly had been hung in every room and spiced oranges decorated the mantle pieces of the fires.

I was pleased with my decorations of the manor and excited to see what Rory would think. The excitement suddenly faded slightly as I remembered his avoidance of me these past weeks. I could not deny that I too had ignored him in response but the manor felt terribly lonely as a result.

Rory's sudden departure to London had given me the chance to think properly about how I felt about him and what I wanted. I had come to realise that I was as much in love with him as ever and with him far away from home my love only grew.

True we were not speaking when at Clampton but he was still there. He was around, he was sleeping in the next room and eating with me in the dining hall even if it were in silence. 

The manor felt empty and isolated without him and I longed for his return although he was not said to return home until tomorrow. I only hoped he would be back in time to eat the feast I was planning to cook for him. It was christmas after all.

I decided to occupy myself with a short walk to the walled garden before dinner was served, at least there the silence would not be so unbearable. In the weeks that Rory and I had evaded seeing and speaking to each other I had sought refuge of sorts in the large garden that reminded me somewhat of my old home.

Unlike my father's estate, Holden house, the walled garden was well kept making it beautiful in a different way to the unkempt wilderness that had been found hidden away in Holden. There was a small stone arch with a bench beneath it in one corner of the garden and this was often where I would sit and try to forget all of marital problems, something that was definitely easier said than done.

I sighed as I entered the garden, leaving the door slightly ajar. Rory would return tomorrow and I was not ready to bear his recent detached and withdrawn nature even if my heart cried out to be near him once more. I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I almost did not notice the deep cough from my side.

"Cecilia," a decidedly male voice said. My head snapped up to see whoever had intruded my private space.

"Edward?" I asked in surprise, what on earth was he doing here? My eyes widened as I felt his hands take hold of my arms.

"Yes it is I my love." My love? Was he deranged, I was a married lady, he could not address me in such an improper way. Before I could correct him however he continued.

"Cecilia, it has been too long. I am sure you know just how much I love you, and I feel that you reciprocate those feelings." I shivered as his hand rubbed up my arm. Using all my strength I pushed him back and moved carefully away from him.

"I am sorry Edward but you are wrong in your assumptions, I do not love you. Maybe once upon a time, when I was a child, I might have held you in high regard, but I do not love you." I tried to make myself clear, hoping my voice was steady and calm as I trembled inside.

"Cecilia come away with me," his voice was louder this time. "We can see the world together, just you and I. We can be together without your idiotic husband getting between us again." I sucked in a sharp breath of the cold air that circle around us as I tried to increase the distance between Edward and myself.

"He has more sense and decency than you will ever have, he is a true gentleman unlike you sir." I defended Rory. "I would never betray him like that."