The Virtual Affection | #Wattys2018

#25 Taking Chances

"So you're telling me he stole my name to get to you?" Dave asks sipping his drink as we both sit at the coffee shop, "Geez, I didn't know my standards had gotten that high."

"Don't flatter yourself." I say, picking up my cup. I'm glad we're getting along as friends after all the drama and embarrassment.

"Why not?" He grins, "It worked, right?"

I suddenly feel heat rush up to my cheeks and I look down. "No. I don't know."

"Come on, spit it out."

"He tried to impress me by being someone else. I know I'm in no position to judge his ways, but how is that supposed to work?"

"You don't get it, do you?" Dave moves his hands, as if trying to prove a point, "Jake wasn't trying to be me, he was just trying to be someone else in your eyes for once - you know, make you look at him as someone other than the bro-zoned best friend!"

I open my mouth to speak, but find no words. Jake and I haven't talked in quite a few days.

"Do you think I should talk to him?" I ask. It's been smothering staying away from my best friend for so long. But that's the confusing part - is he still just a best friend?

"Yes, obviously."

"Right," I nod and get up, "I'll see you later."

"Oh, by the way," Dave passes me a wink, "Dig the haircut." I smile and roll my eyes walking away, flaunting my short boyish haircut.

Jake's house is a ten-minute walk from here. I feel my heart beating a little too loudly. This is weird. I've never felt so confused about my feelings before. I reach the familiar doorstep and ring the bell. His mother opens the door. She's a rather young-looking tall woman, with Jake's chocolate brown hair and blue eyes.

"Sarah!" She smiles cheerfully, "Come on in." I follow her inside. "Jake, Sarah's here!"

She disappears into the kitchen leaving me in sheer awkwardness. I've been in this house so many times yet I've never felt so awkward and nervous before. I see Jake come down the stairs in flannel and messy hair. On seeing me, he pauses a little then in the attempt of hurrying down, trips at the bottom stairs. I can't help letting out a smile.

"Um, hi," he says sheepishly.

"Hey."

"Uh... let's go up to my room and talk."

"Oh, okay, alright."

I follow him up the stairs and my heart starts beating fast again as we both enter his room. It's just another generic teenage-boy room with posters of rock bands and dusty shelves. He makes some space on the bed for me to sit. We both sit down pretty further apart. I can see he is nervous to make eye contact with me.

He finally sighs, "I'm sorry, Sarah."

"Yeah. I'm sorry, too. I was overreacting."

Silence again. I scan his face and am astounded at so many things I never noticed before - the freckles on his nose and cheeks, the sun tan underneath his deep blue eyes, his tense jaw line, and the way he's biting on his lower lip. I wonder what it would feel like to kiss those lips. I mentally slap myself and look away.

"Since when did you like me?" I ask, trying to break the awkward silence.

He blushes and smiles, "Sixth grade. Remember how you stood up for me against some bullies? I couldn't help liking the brave chubby girl in pigtails."

"Hey, I'm not chubby!" I look down at myself in contemplation. He laughs. I've missed the sound of his laugh.

"I couldn't tell you because I was afraid of losing you as a friend." He sighs, "I'm sorry, Sarah, really, I was out of my mind. But it's alright - I understand if you don't feel the same about me."