Bright lights loud noise the smell of burning rubber on the cold pavement. Rain, cold drops of rain falling down through the cracks. Every little drop feeling like a sharp cold knife. Piercing through the outer layer of the skin till it reached inside of you. You think that your body is numb, and won't feel the coldness. But it does, and it hurts, almost enough to make you forget about what just happened to you. The crash that had the highway stopped in its tracks. Backed up past the last intersection, 20 miles back. Screams in every direction, you couldn't get away from them. They were everywhere! Inescapable, you just couldn't find a way out of the madness. So you just sit there and wait, wait for what seems to be forever for someone to help you. Not moving, not even an inch. It’s hard to breathe, so you don't scream. Your lungs feel as though they are about ready to fall off from inside you. And at this point you are thinking that they won't make it, and that maybe the best thing to do is die. Just lay there and die, you're in enough pain anyway, so why not? Right..?
Then you see the light, the one they talk about when you’re about to die. You feel great, like everything around you is okay. As though everything that was bothering you before, just disappeared. As though you were never going to have to feel those pains again. Nothing is wrong; you’re surrounded by your favorite things. You're happy, happier than ever before. Then everything you goes dark, you're not at the happy place anymore. You can't move, you don't seem to have control of anything. You open your eyes to see people, so many people around you. You're on a stretcher, going down a long hallway, flashing light above your head, coming and going over and over again.
"She's awake! She's awake!'" They all scream
They take you into this room, tools are everywhere. Its looks like a horror film, you don't know what they are about to do to you. You look down, and there is blood, all over you. I was one of those people who don't do well with a lot of blood scream. And as quick as you let out that scream they have a mask on you and you’re asleep once again. Not knowing what is going on, or what they are going to do to you.
While you're asleep they operate on you; sewing, gluing, stapling. Trying to do anything they can to get the glass out of your thigh. They numb that part they are operating on; so that even through you're asleep you can't feel a thing.
But throughout the entire operation you're looking at yourself, right at yourself. Like you're outside of your body. Watching what the doctors are doing to you. Feeling as though this is all just a bad dream, hoping praying that this isn't real. That it is all just a silly little dream. But you know that it isn't a silly little dream, this is real. All too real for you, you being only a 15 year old girl. You're still having trouble in algebra. It’s so surreal, so hard to comprehend what they are doing. Needles here and there, knives placed out biggest to smallest. Shard of glass lying on a separate table to the left of you. Imagine what this is going to do to you, you're thinking that you won't be able to make it through this.
Then you remember, you're parents. You have no idea where they are, if their okay, what the hell is going on with them. The whole time you were just sitting there thinking about yourself. But there isn't anything for you to do right now. You're in the middle of surgery; you can't just walk right up and leave. Your mind is racing, you are starting to panic. You don't want to lose your parents. Where would you go? Who would you stay with? Who would want you to stay with them anyway? No one wants a parent less 15 year old girl, who was in a car crash in the middle of a major highway. Why would you want to stay with total strangers anyway? What if their mean? What if they beat you? What if the new school is hard on you? You can't deal with all that, not after this. You're not even sure if you can deal with this!
At least that how things went with me, I still remember every little detail from that night, like it had only happened yesterday. But in reality it had happened a year ago today. I'm 16 now, and with all honesty I’m not any better than I was that night, emotionally that is. My physical damage was healed after a few months and physical therapy. I actually didn't move with total strangers, I moved in with this guy I know, James. James Delong, he is 17 but we get along, man do we get along. You get what I’m saying?
