blue ; gallavich

17

After about a half hour of walking in the cold, morning air I make it to Kash 'N Grab. I wait outside of the store for a few minutes, realizing that this will be the first time I've seen Kash since I quit and since he saw Mick and I having sex in the back. I seriously consider turning around, but I don't seeing that I've already come this far. We all have to face our fears at some point, right? If Mickey could face his father then I can surely face the scared man that is Kash.

I casually walk into the store and Kash pays no attention at first, continuing to flip through his magazine. He head shoots up and he freezes, his mouth wide open in shock and his eyes cold. "Ian." He mumbles. I ignore him, nodding my head in acknowledgment and heading to the back of the store. I pick up some Pringles for Mick, his new favorite is extra cheese, and I grab some Beef Jerky for Mandy. I also get the essentials and place them down on the counter, refusing to make eye contact with my former partner.

Kash waves his hand in dismissal and let's me off without payment. "Thanks." I bring myself to utter as I walk out the doors. I lean up against the brick wall of the store and take a few deep breaths to calm my nerves. The sky seems to have gotten a bit lighter, though not a lot, and the sun has risen a tad higher. I reminisce on the old days when I thought Kash, a man twice my age, was my soulmate. But in reality he was the only other gay man on the South Side that I knew of and that's why we were attracted to each other. Though I may have had some sort of affection for him at the time, it was minimal.

After a rough ten minutes of reviewing the past, I decide to carry on back to Mickey's. With a box full of food in my arms, I begin to feel the heaviness of it all and realize that if I want to make it back with any energy that I have to take a few shortcuts. It's risky, going through abandoned alleyways, but who is going to hurt me? No one is after me or my family, and even Mick is in the clear for once. I mean maybe Caleb or someone-

Caleb.

I completely forgot about my boyfriend until now. I mean, I dont see him in a boyfriend type of way, but he still doesn't know that I caught him cheating. I can feel the pain and fury rise in my chest, and agony suffocates my heart as stop dead in my tracks. But not because of Caleb.

I turn around to see what I make out to be a shadow, but I dismiss it, seeing that it's probably a pigment of my imagination. It's dark and quiet and I'm scared but that's the best time for my mind to fuck around with me. I begin to walk again, hearing footsteps against the ground that aren't mine. I pick up the pace, dialing Mickey's number into my cellphone. It rings four times before sending me straight to voicemail. I try again, muttering "c'mon, c'mon, c'mon". No answer. "Mickey," I cry into the voicemail, "pick up your fucking phone, please."

I stop to check for a signal, and I feel warm air press against my neck, and I nearly have a heart attack as I realize that someone is standing behind me. I slowly turn on my heels to face the one person who I never expected to see again. He glares at me with a mischievous grin and eyes as sharp as knives as they cut through my body. But I look down only to see the blood trickling down my side and realize that his eyes aren't the things cutting me, but an actual knife. I collapse onto the floor and fish out my phone, once again calling Mickey.

"Mick. Mick Mick Mick answer your phone." I croak into the voicemail. I can barely find the strength to dial again, but I do and to no suprise he doesn't answer. "If I die." I begin into what could be my final message, "I love you. Just do me a favor. Don't blame yourself, blame your piece of shit father." I spit viciously into the phone, earning me a kick in the jaw from Terry, who hovers over me, a few men now surrounding him. I hear a loud pop go off and someone cries out, and two more, this time the person screaming in pain is me. I feel two objects burst into my stomach as I grab my sides and moan agonizingly.

Two faces appear in front of me, one of the men holds my sides, earning an ear-piercing shriek from me, and the other frantically holds a cell phone in front of him. I realize who the people are, though my vision is blurry and spotted, and I can make out the faces of Collin and Iggy Milkovich. Being in the state I'm currently in, I can't jump for joy at the thought of the people saving me being people who care about me, but if I could I most definitely would. But even the slightest intake of breath makes my heart feel like it's exploding and my rib cages shred my lungs into little pieces.

I hear someone cough distantly and Collin looks at Iggy in shock before saying what I make out to be, "shit. I think I killed Terry." Iggy runs his hand through his hair stressfully before replying with one of the smartest remarks anyone has ever heard come out of his mouth.

"Who gives a fuck about Terry? If we don't help Ian then we'll be dead, too." Iggy says, and I'm guessing that he's making a reference to Mickey. Mickey would kill them if they let me die and saved Terry. I panic as I see a white flash in my eyes.

"Am I dying?" I creak, every word painstakingly harder to say then the next.

"No. You'll be okay, Ian. Stay with us." Collin reassures me. I never knew how hard it was not to let yourself die until I was the one on the verge of death. At this moment, though, I have one thought going through my mind as my vision fogs up and my body clings on for dear life: Mickey.

I look up at Iggy with every ounce of energy I have left, and force myself to say, "Call Mickey."