LOST & FOUND (a ChanBaek/BaekYeol novella)

CHAPTER II: PAIN (Chanyeol)

The last time I set foot in a hospital was 16 years ago. My mom and dad died in a fire accident. We we're sleeping in our old house back in Jeonju when fire started in our neighbor's house. I remembered dad had gone out to have some time with his colleagues. He got drunk. The fire startled me awake. The air was already thick with smoke. Mom shouted for me to get downstairs and call for help as she shook dad awake desperately. I was only six years old then. I remembered waiting outside, crying, as fire fighters brought out mom from the burning house. Dad didn't make it. Mom was unconscious and parts of her skin were badly burned. The medics rushed her to the hospital. But she didn't make it either. The doctor explained to my uncle that her lungs had collapsed and because of that she had a heart failure. I remembered Uncle Sooman carrying me as I cried and cried and cried until I fell asleep.

After that, I hated going to hospitals. I hated its white walls, its glaring lights, the smell of antiseptic, the smell of blood and people dying. And whenever I saw children with their parents in the park or in the mall, it always brought up memories of mom and dad. I would be running home then, unable to hold back tears, and Uncle Sooman would be there, telling me everything's going to be all right, that he will never leave me alone. He took care of me then. I began to accept mom and dad's deaths as I grew older. I remembered visiting mom and dad in the cemetery almost every weekend. I would talk to them for hours, telling stories from my school. By the end of the day, as I walked back home, I would feel better even though I missed them so much.

****

Four hours had passed. I was sitting outside the emergency room, waiting for the doctor to come out. I bit my nails, trying to stay calm. I was covered in blood from head to toe, bruises and bandages all over my body. But it didn't matter. All that mattered was Baekhyun

Baekhyun. Red coppery blood all over his face, barely breathing. I closed my eyes as memories of the accident lanced through my head, painful and deadly. I clenched my fists. Why? Of all people, why Baekhyun? Why him? I stood up, trying to clear my head. He will be alright. Nothing bad will happen to him. Nothing. I told this to myself over and over again. I exhaled. I didn't know how long I was holding my breath. Oh God. Please. Please. Please. I bit my lip so hard I tasted blood. I ached all over.

I was pacing back and forth when the door to the emergency room opened. Dr. Suho, a man with dark hair and round face, a close friend of mine from EXO Academy, took off his mask and walked towards me, his face unreadable.

I could feel my heart hammering through my chest. Blood pounded in my head, making me light-headed and out of breath. I bit my lip again, unable to hide my anxiety. I felt like I would faint.

Suho sighed.

"He's clearly out of danger," he said carefully. I let out a sigh of relief. "He broke his left arm. He lost a lot of blood and bruises covered his body. He has a hairline fracture to his skull. He might have concussions when he wakes up. And possibly a temporary loss of memory. But his vital signs are stable now."

I racked my brain, trying to absorb everything he said. It took me about four seconds before all of it registered in my brain.

"Wait. What do you mean a temporary loss of memory?" I asked him, disbelief strong in my voice.

Suho clasped his hands in front of him as he continued. "He'd hit his head pretty badly. We did a CT scan and yes, his brain activity is normal, but the impact on his head will possibly give him concussions, resulting to loss of some of his memories. A partial amnesia. He mostly will not be able to recall old memories and recent ones, just like the accident. But don't worry. It's temporary."

Blood was still pounding in my head, making it hard to think. Loss of memory? But Suho said it's temporary. "He'll still be able to remember everything then? After how long?"