030 | OIKAWA TOORU [1]

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SECRET LOVE SONG秘密の愛の歌

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SECRET LOVE SONG
秘密の愛の歌

we keep behind closed doors
every time i see you,
i die a little more
stolen moments that we steal as the curtain falls,
it'll never be enough.

You didn't know.

You were just passing by the cafe after visiting your friend and you didn't expect it. Well, expected the unexpected I guess? The paperbag fell down to the ground as it crashed down, along with the cake you had bought for Oikawa.

Tears prickled your eyes as Oikawa leaned closer to a girl you didn't know, closing the gap between their bodies as they kissed. You bit your lip and grabbed the ruined cake, composing yourself before sprinting to your home.

A slam to the front door startled your dog as you slid down yoir door, clamping a hand over your mouth, supressing the hiccups and the noises you made. Your dog whined, slowly approaching it's master.

You strained a smile and opened your arms wide for your pet as the dog jumped to you, licking off the tears off of your face.

Maybe that's why Oikawa wanted your relationship to be hidden, kept in the dark, hidden in the tall curtains. What you thought behind the reason why Oikawa didn't want your relationship to be exposed in public is because you might be bullied by his fangirls, or even worse-- be threatened by them.

But you were completely wrong.

He made your relationship hidden to cheat behind your back.


it's obvious you're meant for me
every piece of you,
it just fits perfectly
every second, every thought,
i'm in so deep
but i'll never show it on my face.

"(F/n)-chan!" Oikawa knocks on your door, while handling a bag of milk bread.

Your lips curled up in a smile and noticed that it was 7:36, their practice just ended 2 hours ago. You stood up and opened the door as Oikawa hugged you tightly. He smelled of both girls and heavy perfume but you just ignored it wanting not to fight.

"I missed you so much Tooru." You admitted and wrapped your arms around his neck, tip toeing just to reach his height.

"I missed you to (f/n)-chan." He said, nuzzling his head to you, "Well anyways, I brought us some Milk Bread, movies such as Prometheus and Independence Day!" He cheered as you jumped up and down, cannot wait to watch these movies with your boyfriend.

Suddenly, his phone rang and he checked his id caller, silencing you by clamping his hands over your mouth. "Hello? Babe!" He greeted happily and shouted to you, "Mom! Watch the movie without me." As he bowed and went outside, carrying all his stuffs with him but left the movies to aleast give you company.

She silently cried in your seat while staring at the useless movies, thinking so deeply on why do you keep this relationship with him even though it looks like you're is just the only one in love.

You wiped all the tears in your eyes when you heard the footsteps coming from the front door and knew that it was Oikawa.

"I'm sorry (f/n) let's continue the movie, shall we?" He grins and pulled you in a hug while he watched, eating popcorn every know and then.

You were tired but never seem to show Oikawa or Oikawa wasn't able to notice.


when you hold me in the street
and you kiss me on the dance floor
i wish that it could be like that
why can't it be like that?
cause i'm yours.

You would always check out his instagram photos seeing his 'public girlfriend' with him in the street while he holds him in prom, while they were dancing and kissing.

You would always wish that your relationship was just like that because you gave Oikawa everything.

But it looks like he didn't even give a single percent of his time or love.

Oikawa only comes to your side when he gets bored or needs you. That's the painful truth behind your relationship. Oikawa of course, wouldn't agree, but in your perspective and you all reader's perspective knows that he just used you for his personal desires.


why can't we be like that?
wish we could be like that.

In the end, it was still the result. Oikawa pulled you closer after your one-sided love making and snored, tired of what the both of you did. You remained silent in the dark and quiet room, bare. You thought of your relationship with Oikawa. You gave him your everything, didn't you? So why does Oikawa cling to other women?

No matter how much she questioned herself, in the end, she knows she ended up falling for the same trap over and over again, continuing to love the cheating bastard.

oikawa's a big dICK I KNOW

part 2 or nah?

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