Just Normal

Chapter 4

I decided that when I die, they should throw my ashes in the ocean where the fish can eat them because it's not like I'm going to have any friends by that time. Because I'm horrible. Honestly. I don't even know why I hang out with myself.

I felt really bad about the thing with Allie, I'm not even sure why she likes me. I've never really thought about it before because I never believed it, but I guess? And it's not like she's ugly or anything. I just didn't want to hurt her feelings. So because I'm a naive little shrimp, I called her up.

"Heyo, uh, Allieo," I cleared my throat, "What's shakin'?"

Could I be anymore lame?

"Hey Eli! I'm so glad you called. I stopped by earlier, but you weren't home."

Oh, man. She sounds sad. Like disappointed. What do I do? I'm only a boy, only a boy!

"Er, right about that, I'm really sorry. I had this thing. . .it wasn't social or anything, I promise, and it was long and I'm really, really sorry. Oh and I didn't get the fish."

"Aww, you're sweet. It's totally fine. I left the textbook with your mom, by the way. Why didn't you get the fish?"

What the are you thinking, Eli? Is there a mayday button somewhere? Because I needed it pronto.

"Becauseitwasillegal and Devonisasorryexcuseforahuman," I rushed this sentence out under my breath.

"What?"

"Er, I didn't get the chance. I'm real sorry, Allie." I meant it. Kind of.

"Oh. Alright, then. Well, could you make it up to me somehow?" She sounded a bit like she was going up stairs or something because her voice kept on climbing up. Pun intended.

"Sure?" I wasn't exactly sure what she was pining at, but it seemed testy.

"Maybe you can take me to October Fest, yeah? We can go together?"

Can I get a whaaa? Okay, no, I kind of expected this. She does like me and by no means is she the Queen of Subtlety. But, again, whaaa?

"Um, uh, srnjkvdrnbkjdtb." Maybe she'll just let it go because she can't hear me. That's what I do.

"Wait, I can't hear you clearly. Can you repeat that?"

That backfired.

"Um, sure, I'll pick you up at 6. Bye." I slammed the hang up button and fell back onto my bed. What have I done?

I don't like her like that, do I? She was always . . .there. Maybe I do like her. Why else would I want to take her to the October Fest?

Because you have no social skills.

Allie was pretty. And smart. And socially adept. And not a dork. I was lucky that she liked me. Yeah. I looked in the mirror and struck a pose. Curly-ish dark blond hair. Swampy colored eyes. Bony shoulders. Long, thin arms, wiry legs.

I felt nice. Somebody thought I was good-looking. For once, since becoming a teen, I didn't hate waking up in this world the next morning.

But I did hate it when I woke up to my dad hammering something. Zombie-like, I limped downstairs and through the front door to find my dad perched on a tiny ladder hammering new sills to the windows. Very suburban.