A shade of pink flows across my cheeks as I walk back to my band mates.
-Josh's P.O.V-
Oh gosh, did I really just do that? What if she doesn't even like me like that?
I didn't want to make it obvious that I was jealous when I saw Ace and her.
But, I can't help it.
She's incredible.
I walk back on the tour bus to see Tyler grinning at me.
"What?" I ask, clueless.
"You likeee her." Tyler teases.
I lower my head and blush.
I raise my hand to the back of my neck in embarrassment.
"S-So what if I do? I don't even think she likes me back." I shrug and chuckle out of awkwardness.
Tyler moves closer to me and places his hand on my shoulder.
"You won't know unless you ask her out."
Ask her out?
"You really want me to ask (Y/N) out? I've only known her for a short time. She probably doesn't even like me the way I like her. I don't know if I can-"
"Dude. It won't kill you to try. C'mon, I've seen the way you look at her. How you're always excited to see what she says after the concert. The way you talk about her like she's some sort of goddess." Tyler interrupts me and shakes my shoulders.
Ups! Tento obrázek porušuje naše pokyny k obsahu. Před publikováním ho, prosím, buď odstraň, nebo nahraď jiným.
I breathe in.
Tyler wasn't wrong. I really liked (Y/N) a lot. I'm not that close to her but I feel like I've known her for the longest time. From watching her videos online to actually getting to see her perform and open up for us. She was amazing, inside and out.
"Okay, I'll talk to her."
Eventually...
-Your P.O.V-
I walk over to my band mates and they instantly start asking questions.
"Did you guys makeup!?"
"What happened!?"
"Did you guys hug!?"
"Whoa." I interrupt their bombarding questions and breathe in.
"Yes, Josh and I made up."
Karma and Grayson smile like two kids in a candy store.
I laugh at their childish behavior.
"We just talked! Then, I explained that it was all a misunderstanding. Josh hugged me and apologized, although he didn't need to apologize and then..."
Karma and Grayson inch closer to me in anticipation.
"Josh kissed my forehead." I say quietly.
Karma squeals and starts clapping her hands together.
"I knew it! He totally likes you!" She beams.
I laugh back at her excitement.
"Karma, it was probably nothin-"
"Oh, don't you go on with that "it was nothing" crap, miss (Y/N). Face the facts! Josh likes you." Karma grabs my shoulders.
I blush at the information Karma gives me.
Does Josh actually like me?
I smile at my thoughts which quickly disappeared when I remembered my last boyfriend.
Ace.
That jerk.
The last time I got close to someone...they broke my heart.
My smile fades as does Karma and Grayson's.
"(Y/N)?" Grayson interrupts my thoughts and snaps me back to reality.
I look around trying to find a more quiet place to communicate with my band members.
"What's going o-"
I grab Karma's wrist and start to walk over to our van.
Grayson follows us, trying to keep up with my fast-walking feet.
We get to the van and all scoot inside.
I don't even take a second to breathe as I begin explaining.
"I can't like Josh! Oh my god, am I stupid!?" My hands are placed on my temples, practically freaking out.
"(Y/N)-"
"Remember the last time I got close to someone like that!?" I continue.
Tears started to make their way down my face.
I was scared. I was worried.
I can't get close to Josh. I'm too scared.
"(Y/N)!" Karma raises her voice.
I stop breathing so heavily as I look at her.
"You have got to stop worrying so much." Karma demands.
I inhale and exhale.
"I'm scared." I quietly say.
"I know, but at some point you just have to stop being so scared of the world. You gotta go out there and face it." Karma gives me a re-assuring smile as she removes her hand from my shoulder.
"Thanks, Karma." I shrug and fake smile back.
Karma hugs me and so does Grayson.
I hug them back pretending to feel better.
I didn't want them to know but Ace was actually the only person who knew me the best. And even he didn't know everything about me. Karma and Grayson, even though they were two of my really good friends and my band members, didn't know that much about me as Ace did. And like I said, even the guy I was closest with doesn't know as much as he thought. I still have things stored in my head that I've never even said out loud before. Getting close to someone was something I was terrified of. The day Josh told me I could trust him...I became paranoid. Because the people in my life hadn't always been honest with me. I'm terrified to get close to anyone because those people that said they would "always be there for me" left. At any point in your life someone could say that they'll never leave you and the next day they're gone. Josh is one of the sweetest people I have ever met. But I don't know if even Josh Dun himself can help me get over the fear of getting close.
A/N: AH! so you finally know why this story is called "close"! I've been trying to work that last part into this story ever since it began lol. now hopefully you'll understand the story a bit more! thanks for reading and thank you SO SO MUCH for a thousand reads!! that's absolutely unbelievable. thank you from the bottom of my heart :-) -b
