My Inner Demon (CieLizzy Fanfic)

Part 1

Hey this is my first CieLizzy fanfic so sorry if it sucks LMAO
It takes place after Ciel becomes a demon. :) Enjoy

Empty.
I felt like nothing mattered anymore. Nothing at all. And no pink dresses, cute hairstyles or new earrings that mother bought for me, could cheer me up. Nothing.
And no matter how much i tried to hold it in and no matter how much it worked, it didn't matter. Not anymore. It was all for him anyway.
I was only strong because of him.
For him.
But he's gone and no matter how much i want him back or what i would give, it wouldn't do anything.
Ciel. My love. My fiance. My everything.
He was gone.

"Elizabeth dear, you haven't touched anything since it was put on the table. It is not proper for a lady to space out like that." My mother said, snapping me out of me thoughts. The thoughts i had everyday.

I looked down. I really hadn't touched anything. Not even my fork. Not that i wasn't hungry. To be honest i really couldn't tell anymore.
Not that i really cared anyway.

"I'm truly sorry mother but i seem to not be very hungry this evening. Can i go to bed early?" I asked with my voice as sweet as sugar, that it almost made me sick. Yet i always talked like that.

She looked like she was about to shake her head but instead just let out a sigh and nodded.
"Goodnight dear."

I nodded back, said goodnight to the rest of my family and then left the table to go to my room.
Not that i wanted to sleep yet. I just wanted to be alone. Like always these days. All alone in the pity-world that is my thoughts.

I gently touched my lime-green evening gown with two of my fingers, slowly going along the small yellow bows that was all the way down on my dress.
About two years. It was about two years since i last had seen Ciel. Or Sebastian for that matter. Not that i really cared much about him anyway. Yet i couldn't help but be a bit jealous that he always got to spend time with Ciel when i couldn't. Well Ciel didn't have many others but still.

I looked in the mirror as soon as i had closed the door. I didn't even turn the lights on. It wasn't all that dark anyway.
I could still see myself. And i didn't like what i saw. My pigtails were all sloppy and it looked like i hadn't brushed my hair and my dress didn't look like it fit me anymore.
It was too...cute.
I never thought i ever was gonna think that but i did. I only wanted to look cute for Ciel.

I focused on my face in the mirror, which made me even more uncomtable. I was 16 now. I didn't look like i used to.
I hardly smiled anymore. Unless i had to but then it was fake.
My eyes were all dull and lifeless. Which was a shame because people always loved my eyes. It was usually the first thing they would comment about when they met me and i had loved it. When i was with Ciel, i never expected that i would ever end up alone in the end. But i guess it finally happend.

I finally found my inner demon.

But maybe it was best that way. I couldn't always be the innocent little girl with the big smile everyone always wanted me to be. I had go grow up and become a lady. Someday i would probably even have to get married to someone.
Someone else than Ciel. Just the thought. I couldn't stand it. No one even talked about him anymore.
At least not in a good way.
There were so many rumors of what could have happend to him and who could have done it, that i remember almost made me stop breathing two years ago.
It somehow seemed like he had many enemies. And if just one of them was the reason to why he was gone, there was nothing i could do and i hated that.

Still i had never stopped thinking about what could have happend.
My thoughts were cut off when i heard something fall off from one of my shelves but it was too dark to see.

I walked closer but couldn't exacly see what had fallen off so i picked it up and walked over to my window and stood right in the middle so the moonlight shined down on it.
It was just a tea cup. It was in two pieces now. I had even gotten a small cut on my hand from when i had picked it up. It wasn't really bleeding much and almost didn't hurt so i didn't think much of it.
It was one of the first tea cups i had gotten when i was little. Reminded me of when me and Ciel used to play around all the time

Tear suddenly started to roll down my cheeks. I missed him so much that i couldn't take it. The pain just wouldn't stop.
And i refused to believe that the boy i had spend most of my life with, the boy who always made sure i was comtable and happy, the boy i loved so much would ever do something so evil that someone would want to get rid of him.

"You are not evil Ciel, are you?" I whispered, closing my eyes and still holding the tea cup.
And when i was about to open them again, i could feel something touching my hand right where i had cut it.

"Oh Lizzy. How could you ever call me evil when revegne is one of the sweetest feelings?" Someone suddenly whispered.
And i knew who it was.

Hope that wasn't too bad 😂😂
Should i write a part 2?