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Justin's POV

we all heard the saying "if you love someone, let them go".

letting go wasn't the most easiest thing for me, but i had to. I was incredibly in love with Selena.

it still hurts to think about her, everything around reminds me of her, waking up in the mornings wanting to see her gorgeous face but is replaced with a pillow. her favorite artists and bands have occupied my music playlist and constantly played with the speakers. our small trips we took to get away from our lives and focus on us.

the first time we made love in the back of my car, it wasn't romantic but our feelings were strong and we thought it was the perfect chance. our first kiss was also in that car, it is in my garage and hasn't been used since i let her go.

i still remember every fight or argument we had, not only did it hurt her, it hurt me. i never meant to say those hurtful words or cheat on her with lowlife girls throwing themselves at me. I cheated on a woman for a girl.

Scooter walked in, his face showed emotion of sadness. everyone's face was full of sadness, but mine? full of regret, anger, hurt, and depressed. Scooter grabbed my shoulder and pulled me into a hug. At that point I didn't care if anyone saw me crying, everyone knew how much I was hurting right now.

"we miss her too, this wasn't your fault. but come on its time" i pulled away from the hug and fixed my tie. walking into my living room, I see everyone covered in black from head to toe, crying on someone's shoulder or staring at the floor. Walking outisde to the porch, I see Mandy and Pattie crying and hugging each other, those two were like best friends.

breathing in deeply, i step inside the black van and put on my sun glasses, watching everyone walk out of the house and into their cars I catch a glimpse of the heartbroken faces on everyone. I see her two best friends Courtney and Theresa holding each other and walking to the van behind mine, they were both trying to keep a strong face, but I knew how much they were hurting.

She's gone, and there's nothing I can do about it. my beliebers are worried sick about me, they knew how much Selena meant to me, but Selena's fans had it hard loosing their idol because of a stupid drunk driver.

I remember when I received the news that day.

I was in bed watching a random movie on Netflix and eating Subway. I heard my phone go off and seen Scooter calling me, weird it was my week off. Tapping the answer button and hearing the sound of a woman crying in the back, sounded alot like my mom.

"justin, where are you right now?" Scooter asked breathing heavily

"at home watching Netflix, why?" I asked nonchalantly

"have you seen the news yet?" he sounded nervous

"Scooter what's wrong, you're scaring me" I grabbed my laptop from the counter and turned it on.

"justin, im so sorry" he croaked, why is he crying? "please don't hurt yourself when you see the news" he took a deep breath. "search for selena, me and your mother will be there in a few" and he hung up.

shaking, I typed Selena's name on the search bar and felt my heart drop

Selena Gomez:
life lost to a drunk driver.

I broke down, and cried.

this has to be a joke, I told myself and grabbed my phone and opened twitter. checking the hash tags, and my eyes caught the first trend .

#RIPSelenaGomez

loosing my mind, I throw my phone at the wall and run into the kitchen, opening every cabinet and smashing every plate on the ground, not caring about how much I spent on them.

stepping on a piece of glass, I scream and fall to the ground and hold my foot. blood covered my hand, and the floor beneath me. Hearing the front door open and footsteps of two people, I see my mom run to me and hug me. Scooter comes in and runs out, but returning with the First aid kit.

soon everything becomes a blur, and the last thing I heard before passing out was from my mom "selena is gone baby, she's gone"

Those three words will haunt me forever, Selena is gone.

I locked myself in my house, alone. logged out of every social media I had, and would only eat when I need to. It's been five weeks since the world has seen or heard from me. I never thought this would've happened to her, it should've been me instead.

hearing the left side of car door open, I see my mom and Scooter climbing inside and sitting next to me. Scooter whispered a go to the driver, watching the couples walking in the streets holding hands, laughing, and kissing, I bit my lip to keep me from crying.

closing my eyes, i think about all the memories me and selena had together.

It was raining, Fredo, Selena and I were inside cuddling and watching friends.

breathing in lightly, I get up and selena looks at me confused. Fredo also confused.

"what are you doing babe? I'm cold" selena whined as I grabbed her hand and dragging her outisde with me, Fredo came along after grabbing his phone.

" Selena come with me, and don't let go" I grabbed her hand and intertwined our fingers, and ran out of the porch into the rain.

Selena laughed as the rain drops hit us, wetting our clothes. I picked up selena, and held her thigh and back as Selena's face collided with the rain, she laughed and smiled closing her eyes. Fredo took pictures of us.

"Selena I love you so much" I yelled at her. she looked back down at me and smiled. she leaned down and locked our lips.

"i love you so so much Justin"

"i love you so so much Justin"

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"a rainy dream"

"Justin, we're here" my mom said, grabbing my hand and brushed her fingers against my white pale knuckles.

"mom, it hurts" i breathed in deeply and let go. "it hurts alot"

"i know baby, but remember selena is safe right in the arms of jesus, she is watching out for you" she kissed my cheek and walked out of the car.

I step out, and stare at the sky. grabbing the promise ring from my pocket, selena gave me. I kiss it, and slip it on.

"I will see you soon, babygirl"

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