Heya guys here's the next chapter of the story, Really hope you like it, Leave me your feedback.
This chapter is dedicated to HopelessRealist.
Niall's Pov:
It just feels right, It feels normal kissing Zayn and doing things with him, Dare I say it it feels almost natural, I can't help but keep thinking why don't I feel anything special with Connor? I thought I loved him, Before I started seeing Zayn I thought he was the one for me, I thought he was the one making me feel special, The way he was kissing me I thought that was how I was meant to be kissed, I thought he was hinting at us to have sex because he loved me and it was something we were meant to share together, But now I'm not so sure. The way Zayn is with me it makes me feel special, It makes me feel happy, He's so gentle and careful with me but he's not my boyfriend so he dosen't have to be. He's always telling me to make sure I'm doing this for the right reasons, For myself not for somebody else, At first I thought I was doing this for myself but now I'm not so sure, Looking back now I'm doing this for Connor because I thought I loved him, And I thought I wanted to sleep with him and give him my virginity but now I'm just not so sure.
I know it's normal to have doubts when it comes to something like this, But I don't feel like I'm having doubts, I feel like I've never been a hundred percent sure about this. I've always wanted to lose my virginity to somebody I really love, Somebody who cares for me and is gentle and sweet, I can't help but feel that if I do have sex with Connor it won't be gentle at all. I'm so confused, With Zayn I feel like I can sit down and have a long conversation with him, With Connor it's not like that anymore.
"What's up with you face ache?" Harry's voice sounded in my ears, I looked up to see him standing at my door.
"When did you get here?" I asked.
"Few minutes ago your mum let me in" Harry walked over to my bed. "Budge up" He stated, I did so and he sat down beside me on the bed. "So what's up?" Harry questioned.
"Thinking" I replied.
"About what?" Harry asked.
"Connor and Zayn" I said, Harry nodded.
"What's happened?"
"Nothing, It's just Zayn's so different to Connor, Connor's my boyfriend he's supposed to wrap his arms around me and make me feel safe, When he kisses me he's supposed to be gentle and caring but he's not, And all those things is what Zayn does and I'm not even his boyfriend Harry" I exclaimed.
"You doubting your love for Connor?" Harry said, I slowly nodded my head.
"I dreamt about Zayn last night" I informed him.
"What happened in the dream?" Harry asked.
"We were together, Like as a couple, He was holding me so close to him but still allowing me to breathe, He was gently kissing my lips running his fingers through my hair, Grazing his fingertips over my body, Everything he does in our sessions, How gentle he is" I informed him, Harry sighed.
"Nialler, Zayn's a sex teacher, He has to be gentle with the people he's teaching" He said.
"You don't know him Haz, He's just, I can't even describe it, Everything Connor isin't is what Zayn is" I exclaimed, Harry put his arm around me.
"Mate your my bestfriend, I love you as if you were a real brother to me, But right now your confused about your feelings and you don't know what to think, Just give it time to see how things work out, Don't rush into anything and whatever you decide to do whether that be stay with Connor or leave him I'll support you a hundred percent" Harry informed me, I smiled.
"I know, I love you Haz" I stated before pulling him into a hug.
"I love you too Ni" Harry replied.
After a few hours Harry and I decided to get some food, We headed down to the local pizza shop and ordered our food, As Harry ordered I looked around the place, It was mid afternoon so it wasn't that busy, My eyes scanned the room and I nearly chocked on my breath when I saw Zayn sitting at one of the tables with two people, I grabbed hold of Harry's hand causing him to look at me with confused eyes.
"It's Zayn!" I exclaimed, Harry followed my gaze to Zayn's table.
"Which one?" He asked.
"The one with the white t-shirt on" I informed him.
"You mean the one who's standing up and coming over here?" Harry questioned, My eyes widened as I looked up, Sure enough Zayn was making his way over to us.
"Niall mate how you doing?" Zayn asked as he stopped infront of me.
"I'm alright, You?" I replied as I quickly hugged Zayn.
"Yeah all good" He said.
"This is my mate Harry" I stated as I motioned towards him.
"Nice to meet you mate" Harry commented as he extended his hand to Zayn, Zayn took hold of it and they shook hands.
"You too, Why don't you guys join me and my mates?" Zayn suggested, I quickly nodded my head, Zayn smiled before signaling for us to follow him. "Boys this is Niall and Harry, Niall, Harry this is Louis and Liam" Zayn introduced us to his friends before sitting down, I sat down beside Zayn and Harry sat opposite me.
"Nice to meet you" Liam said as he smiled warmly at us, Harry and I returned the smile. We all sat laughing and joking for what felt like hours, My face was bright red as all of us laughed happily and made jokes, I was shocked at how natural this all felt, Even when I was laughing so hard that I had to grab hold of Zayn's arm for support he smiled warmly at me and placed a hand behind my back, When he did that I couldn't help but turn redder.
"Niall where you been all day you ain't been answering your phone" Connor's voice sounded in my ears, I looked up to see him standing infront of me.
"Must be on silent" I replied, Connor nodded before turning his attention towards Zayn, Liam and Louis, He looked at Zayn's hand on my back before looking him up and down with a disgusted look on his face.
"Who are you guys?" He asked.
"I'm Zayn" Zayn replied casually, He gently grazed his thumb over my back before removing his hand.
"How do you guys know eachother?" Connor questioned.
"He's a friend of my cousins" Harry butted in, I'll thank him later for that.
"Hm, Alright then Niall we have to go" Connor stated, I sighed before nodding my head.
"I'll see you guys" I mumbled, Zayn gave me a concerned look as I looked up, I then allowed Connor to pull me away, That was awkward.
