Is this reality? (Harry Potter/George Weasley FF)

Chapter nineteen - Mess of Emotion.

Charlotte's POV:

Ever since I went back in time, every day I've gone down to the Black Lake and sat where my dad once sat, I feel no closer to him by doing this but for some reason I keep hoping that somehow it will bring me closer to him and I want to slap myself for that. I keep getting my hopes up only to be let down every single time, when will I learn?! I'm sat under the tree by the lake right now, most of the snow has melted away but it's still cold especially since it's a very crisp February morning and it's also about half seven in the morning. Yep that's right I'm outside at that ungodly hour and I've been sat here for the past 2 and a half ungodly hours, once again I couldn't sleep so I came and sat out here with a blanket and just thought about life while watching the sun rise over the lake, I know deep shizzzz.

'Lottie? What you doing out here, everyone's been looking for you everywhere!' I hear someone say behind me and I turn to see George, I smile weakly at him as he sits down next to me and I put the blanket over him too 'So what are you doing out here?!' he asks me and I shrug

'I couldn't sleep so I came out and started thinking.' I told him and he continued to look at me but my eyes were on the lake

'What were you thinking about?!'

'How I keep getting my hopes up and keep getting let down each time I do.' I tell him truthfully

'Sometimes the hopes and dreams that come true are the ones we never knew we had.' he told me and I finally tore my gaze off of the lake to stare at him, did that seriously just come out of his mouth?

'Since when did you get so deep and intelligent?' I ask him still slightly dumbfounded by what he just said

'Everyone knows me as the carefree, funny guy and no one really gives me a chance to be the deep, caring guy!' he tells me and I can tell he isn't lying, he seems a bit sad about it

'I'm always here if you wanna talk about it.' I tell him, really not wanting him to be so sad, he sighs and then starts to spill his feelings

'I've always been known as the more quiet twin, the less funny twin so everyone always prefers Fred and sometimes it makes me feel a bit unloved and unwanted but I cover up my sadness by making others happy by pranking. I don't want to hide anymore but sometimes it all gets to much though, it really gets to you never being anyone's favourite!' he tells me and I'm now utterly gobsmacked, how could he think that

'You're my favourite!' I tell him in a barly audible voice. I keep my eyes on the blanket covering us but that didn't stop me from being able to feel George's gaze burning a hole in the side of my head

'Really?!' he said in the same barely audible tone as I did and I tear my gaze away from the blanket to look up at George as I nod, he smiles but it's quickly replaced with a frown which makes me stare at him quesionabley 'You're not just saying this because you feel sorry for me?!' he ask and I laugh a little

'No George I really, truly, honestly mean it!' I tell him and he smiles

'So want to talk more about what you were thinking about?!' he asks me changing the subject and I sigh, there's no one I trust more than George apart from Harry but I don't think I could have this conversation with Harry

'I set myself up for disaster and I need to stop being so naive and vunerable.' I tell him and he nods seeming to understand what I'm trying to say 'Why does this always happen to me? Did I do something wrong and this is my punishment? Is there something wrong with me?' I ask and he looks me in the eye for a moment before answering

'This isn't a punishment Lottie, we accept the love we think we deserve. There'll come a day when you know what you truly deserve and that'll be the day when you finally have someone who considers you their whole world and would do anything for you.' he tells me, his eyes never leaving mine.