Roommates || CANCELED

Chapter 12: Guilt, Scott, and The Present

I HAVENT UPDATED THIS IS 10
TRILLION YEARS WOW SORRY

btw this might be smutty ;;;;;;))))

wow im really proud of this

I tried not to cry during Mr. Sanders' class. I tried not to cry all day. I couldn't stop thinking about last night. I was so stupid, me crying and overreacting just because he saw me without clothes. God, I'm so dumb.

Mitch, you're gonna make yourself cry again. Stop it.

Scott didn't say goodbye this morning. He lost his voice, or he just couldn't bring himself to talk. His classes end late. He's gonna come back to the room while I'm in it.

I don't think I can face him.

Stop overreacting. God, grow up.

"What's wrong?" Kirstie asked.

"You ok?" Avi asked.

"Mitch, promise me you're ok." Esther said.

"Hey, you look sad. Don't want your pretty face to be sad." Tyler flirted.

I couldn't even try to fake an "I'm fine". I just shook my head and walked away. Mr. Sanders let the class go and I walked to the dorm, getting my key and going in the room, closing the door.

Even this fucking room makes me wanna cry.

I put my bag on the floor and I got into bed, not caring about all the homework I had to do. The sheets covered me and warmed me up, acting like Scott.

Scott.

He doesn't deserve me.

He doesn't deserve to deal with me.

I felt tears start to roll down my cheeks. Who cares? I was alone now.

I'm such a pathetic little bitch.

I don't deserve him.

He's probably already realized that.

Mitch, shut the fuck up. You keep on overreacting. You're fucking 18, stop acting like a baby. Grow the fuck up.

I went to sleep, cause I didn't want to deal with reality anymore.

"Get away from me!"

Scott was sobbing on the floor. I've never seen him cry that hard.

"I-It was just a d-dream, Mitch."

It was just a dream.

A fucking dream.

I woke up suddenly, feeling like I was drowning. The dream was more vivid than last night. Scott was sobbing harder. I sat up in my bed, feeling like the world was spinning. I couldn't breathe.

I stood up, running my hands through my hair. I almost punched myself, but I couldn't do that again. My mom would send me to therapy again. I tried to breathe, I really tried. My legs almost gave out so I put my hands on the wall. Scott can't see me like this.

Scott.

Baby boy.

I love you.