Finding Grace: The Guardian Chronicles Book One

Chapter 26. The Truth is Hard to Swallow*

Chapter 26. Little Lion Man by Mumford and Sons

Evan was having a lot of trouble assimilating all the information Emil had told her today. As she stood in the kitchen leaning on the counter, in the place he so easily relaxed, she thought of the anguish she had seen in his eyes when he spoke of his family. He seemed heartbroken. Then, when he spoke of trying to care for his fiancée, Ana, after she lost her mind, it gave her more of an opening into his soul. He seemed to truly want to do good, despite the fate he had been given.

Her mind struggled to grasp his position with the 'Brethren'. How could someone who seemed so good be an executioner, a contract killer? At least that is how she understood what he had described as his job. She didn't think she could stand it if he was as cold-blooded as the mythical vampire. He had not exhibited any of the behavior of a killer; he had only shown her kindness and protection; not only herself, but also Nathan Clark. A silent tear rolled down cheek. There were many things she did not understand about Emil's world. She had to trust her instincts that Emil was not evil.

She roughly scrubbed the tears from her face, pushed off the counter and returned to the living room. The beautiful man who sat on her couch silently looking at her seemed more like an angel than a demon.

"Emil, I have to see if I am getting this straight. You work for some sort of vampire CIA, and you are the one who assassinates vampires who are not following the rules. Do they even get to tell you their side of the story?" she demanded.

Emil leaned forward and looked up at her face. "In so many words...Yes and yes. I do let them give me their side of things. But you need to understand, often the vampires I deal with are out of their mind. They are often Newborns created by accident, by a vampire that did not finish their job. The Newborns I have to destroy have never been taught, and they are not receptive to being taught once they have been feral for too long. On occasion I bring one in to the Enclave where they determine if the creature is salvageable.

"I am not a killing machine. I do my job well enough that I do not have to kill others unnecessarily. My world is different from yours. I must kill in order to save lives. You just have to save lives when they come to you. It is already too late most of the time when the wretches cross my path."

Evan studied Emil's tortured visage. She listened to what he said, and willed herself to believe in his words. He was good. He was still looking in her eyes, begging her to see that what he said was true. She went and stood in front of where he sat perched on the edge of the couch.

"I believe you. I believe that you are doing the best you can to be good, with what you have been given."

He let out a breath he had been holding and leaned his head against her stomach. She wrapped her arms around his head, and let her fingers slide through his hair. She felt his cool grip as he wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I know you are good, Emil. You do understand that my whole world has been turned upside down in the last couple of days, don't you? I am inquisitive by nature, and I ask a lot of questions until I'm satisfied with the answers." Evan wanted him to understand her hesitancy to accept him wholly right away.

He nodded against her, the sensation like a bowling ball rolling against her stomach, making her feel slightly queasy. She put her hands on his shoulders, and gently pushed him away from her.

"Whatever happens with Nathan, I will trust that it was for the best. I don't hold you responsible," she said seriously.

Emil stood, holding onto her elbows. "I think I will go ahead and go now. I've given you enough things to think about to last a couple of weeks. I appreciate you listening to me. It felt so good to have someone to share my life history with. I am so sorry if I caused you grief."