I stared blankly as the teacher informed us of a news student, Roy. How could I have forgotten about him being in my chemistry class? It has only been… I looked over at the clock. It’s only been one hour, forty minutes and six seconds since we last spoke.
Of course the only seats open were the two empty ones in the front and the one beside me. Three empty seats total, not counting the absent students. I sighed already knowing where he would sit. He glanced at my direction and then proceeded to sit down somewhere in the front. Okay I was wrong.
I sighed in relief and started writing random poems to pass the time. I often did that since it was all I was actually good at. “Pathetic.” I mumbled insulting myself. The teacher went to the front of the room and started to explain what we were about to do. I sighed and looked at her.
“Basically you are trying to separate the salt from a solution of iron, sand and salt. Any questions?” Hands shot through the air. She pointed at one.
“How are we supposed to do it?” The girl asked with a shy voice.
“You have your partners, you figure it out.” She said watching the hands go down. “Go.” She said. I got up and got my goggles, since this class has an odd number of students, I managed to convince Mrs. Stein to let me work alone. As I was getting the solution, I noticed Roy already started working. I hurried into a lab area and started working with a magneto separate the iron. No way is he finishing before me. Once separating all of the iron, I put some of the solution in a small test tube filled with water. And dumped that water into a filter, which allowed access only to salt water to pass thru it and into the bigger test tube.
I looked over at Roy, and he was also working fast. After all of the salt water passed thru the filter, I turned on the Bunsen burner and began to boil the salt-water solution. Once I made three piles, one of salt, one of sand, and one of iron, I took it over to Mrs. Stein. It took me 10 minutes and 50 seconds to finish, but I finished. Roy was right behind me; I wondered why I suddenly got competitive with time.
Sitting down on my seat, I continued to write my poems, from time to time looking up to see who was finished with the lab, and who wasn’t. As simple as this 6th grade level lab was, it was a good way to practice for future labs. I just hope that the future labs will be more complicated.
I remembered how my mother, who loved science, would take me to see her work with different elements. I smiled at the good memory. The last time she took me in her lab was… I looked at the clock. Six years, five months, three days, four hours, ten minutes, and I estimate 24 seconds.
“Why are you dozing off while looking at the clock?” Roy asked. My eyes darted from the clock, to his military cut hair and finally to his eyes.
“I’m just calculating time.” I said with another false smile. “To see when class ends.” I added that to the lie to eliminate future questions.
“You don’t seem like the time to be eager to leave class.” He said, and he was right. I don’t mind where I am; I don’t have anything to be eager for, except maybe being alone.’
“Don’t judge a book by its cover.” I tried to make a joke. He chuckled; I guess I’m good at jokes. His laughter stopped after 5 seconds. We both stayed silent for 23 seconds, 24 seconds, 25, 26…
“Why do you always look down?” My gaze returned to his eyes. I hadn’t even realized that I was looking elsewhere. I shrugged.
“It’s a habit.” I mumbled, quickly putting on a smile. He sighed, clearly annoyed with my smile, so I dropped it. He lifted a curious brow and I looked at my desk.
“Anyway, Mrs. Stein told me to start working on this worksheet with you.” He said handing me a piece of paper, as if to prove him right. I took the paper from him and examined it. I determined it would take three minutes and 45 seconds to complete it. Roy sat down beside me, getting ready to work. I looked over at the clock before starting.
Although it was a group activity, we did our work in silence. It took me three minutes and fifty seconds to finish it, and four minutes for him to finish it. Soon enough the bell rang and I went to the library.
The library was empty today, just the way I liked it. There was no sound coming from the conversations between friends, no cellular noise, nothing. The only sounds within earshot was of a few page flips of the five books being read, and some noise from footsteps out of the hallways that surrounded this library. Here it was peaceful, and I was thankful for that.
Footsteps came my way, I sighed already knowing who was coming for me. They were now behind the chair I was seated on. I stayed seated and waited, and soon a small note was dropped onto my lap and the stranger went away. I opened the note and read it.
“Watch your back GRIM.”
I sighed once more. Everyday a person comes to warn me. The first time was years ago, she wore a mask so that I couldn’t identify her. The first time, she warned me about a plan of a few students to gang up on me; it’s safe to say I managed to avoid it once.
Afterschool I decided to walk to the opposite direction from my house, to a place I often went for comport. I always visited this place, especially after the accident. It was raining pretty hard outside, but I had left my backpack in my locker since I had finished all of my assignments. I was soaking wet by the time I reached the beautiful rural hill that circled around a clear lake fiving off a bowl like effect. It was a perfect hiding place, far enough for the city for no one to notice it, but close enough to walk to it.
The scenery was beautiful, it wasn’t taken over by trees, but rather by tall overgrown green grass decorated with only a few trees, one of which my mother and I often sat under or climbed. The cool lake danced by the drops of rain hitting it with speed and force. I began to walk towards the lake, planning on sitting by the edge, but instead I tripped due to the slippery wet grass, I rolled down the hill and continued rolling on the small flat surface that separated hill from lake, and finally, I rolled into the lake itself.
I started to sink, feeling my body ache from the rocks that stabbed my skin as I rolled. The breath I had was soon leaving me to go back out of the lake. Honestly though, I didn’t mind. My heart might be beating fast; my lungs may be closing, leaving me claustrophobic and filled with anguish and anxiety; my blood might be pulsing desperately to move my muscles and save me from drowning; but I didn’t mind. The more I thought about it, the less I cared. I had no real friends, my classmates would be shocked, but they won’t care; dad had no interest in me, he would finally be able to move on; mom would be disappointed, but maybe I could see her again in the afterlife? If there was one, that is.
I closed my eyes; 22 seconds, I stopped trying to hold my breath, letting it slip away from me. I felt the water pulling me down, down to the bottom of the lake. Down to nowhere, where I belonged.
I was satisfied, smiling; this was a good way to go. It wasn’t suicide, not murder, just fading away; no blood was spilled and nearly no pain.
This is my end: simple, but efficient.
