The Skinny Boy Tales (boyxboy) - Completed-

Chapter 7

Sulking through the house, I made it to my room to find Steven plopped in the middle of my bed. Over the past few days, he became something of my shadow. He always seemed to be where I was. I didn’t mind it; I actually found an odd comfort in his constant presence. 

I appreciated how much he cared about me; it was a nice change of pace. 

“You look a little rough, Max. You ok? How did your little meeting with the nurse go?” Steven shot his questions at me as he leaned up from the bed. The sun was already making it way behind the landscape, darkening the room. Despite the fleeting light, Steven’s pale eyes shone brightly.

Shrugging, I fell onto the bed, finding my nook next to Steven and resting my head in his lap. Instantly, his hands went to my hair. He ran his fingers through the stubble protectively. “It went well even though I’m getting fat.” I pouted.

“You’re not getting fat, Max!” Steven snapped all too quickly. 

I lifted my eyes, meeting his serious stare. Something about the way his eyes twinkled shattered the last remaining grip I had on myself. I tried to smile as tears welled behind my eyes. As tears trailed down my cheeks, I came to the realization that no matter what, I as going to gain weight at the skinny boy house. 

I couldn’t help but smile at how ironic that was.

The skinny boy house, where skinny boys come to get fat.

I supposed it never donned on me that I would actually gain weight here. My brain must have skipped that part while I mentally prepared for this wretched place. It was still funny to me that I thought I wouldn’t gain weight at a live-in clinic for boys battling eating disorders.

Steven wiped away my tears with his thumb as he pulled me effortlessly to his chest. “You’re the most beautiful person I have ever met, Max.”

A thousand doubts crossed my mind as Steven spoke. How could he think I was beautiful when I thought I was nothing more than a giant, fat, gross pathetic excuse of a human being? 

No one will ever love you, mocked my mind.

I buried my face into Steven’s chest. My fingers balled into fits around the loose fabric of his shirt.

I hated myself.

I hated everything about myself. 

No one would ever love me.

I’m pathetic, I thought. I just want to be perfect; I just want to be good enough for everyone else. 

You’ll never be good enough, my internal voice whispered, and I believed him.

“Hey,” Steven began softly, “smile.” His words were so simple and followed with a gentle smile of his own. He went on to say how everything would get better.

Honestly, I wanted to believe him; I desperately wanted to believe this wonderful boy in front of me; however, I couldn’t. My worst nightmares were becoming a reality.

I had no control over anything anymore; I couldn’t even control my own weight anymore.

As if on Steven’s command, I sucked it up, and smiled weakly up at him. 

“See,” he trailed his thumb down my cheek, “all better, right?”

No!

NO!

“Yes,” I lied. “We still have some time before dinner.” I couldn’t even handle thinking about food, so I moved on quickly. “How much time do we have before we have to go to our classes?”