2 Shades of Green

shreks p.o.v

It had been 6 years since Foina left me. She said I wasn't ogre enough for her and she ended up marryin Puss in boots. She just wanted the pussy. I was a lonly ogre walking down the aimless path of life...but then I saw him.

His orange skin resembling that of a peach and his glazed hair which nearly blew off his head like a wig in the wind. His name was...Donald Trump.

It all started when I was working at the maid cafe in far far away. I was in my dainty little dress feeling the air in my jiblets. We weren't busy that day, just like any other day. Since we had no customers I whipped out my mp4 player and listened to some smash mouth all star. Then I heard the bell ring as the door swung open. I paused the music and turned my haed round. In all his glory was Donald, he was alone. I thought in my head 'I love a lone wolf.' I arose from my creaky chair to serve him. He glared at me with his beady eyes and his smug smile. 'what would you like to order?' I asked palms sweating. 'I will have a smol loan of a million dollars'. I gulped a mighty one, 'um...s-sorry we are out of smol loans'. He looked me dead in the eye. ''Whats ur name?'' he assed, ''Shrek...whats urs?'', ''Donald Trump'' he replied.

wow that name just screemed fuckboy and I liked it. ''Well Donald, I am sorry I don't have a loan of a million dollars, but I can provide something else'' I said flirtatously rolling my dainty skirt up my leg slightly. ''What is it?'' he assed. ''I can provide you with date at my place right now'' I said feeling a boner come along. Donald agreed and we went back to my swamp.

We sat on the bed and Donald said ''you have beautiful eyes''. I blushed ''tee hee I also have a beautiful pelvis, care to see?''. Donald said yes and I whipped out my penis and it sprang up in all its glory. Donald was shocked yet turned on. I immediatly stripped Donald naked and pinned him against a wall. Donald 11 incher sprang up and poked mine at the tip. I then snatched a blindfold and handcuffs nearby and blind folded him and handcuffed him to the bed. Donald said ''Take me Shrek I want to feel your layers''. with tat I barged my member in his anus letting out a mighty roar '' oh Donald, you are the onion to my layers.'' Donald moaned. 'wow' I thought, he sounds just like wild boar when he moans..I liked it. Donald came quickly, so did I, or white juices squirted everywhere with such agility. Donald then gave me a blowjob. I yelled at the toop of me lungs ''RAWR, Fiona could never do this ith such skill'' Donald knew what he was doing. After I came once more I took off Donalds handcuffs and blindfold and we flung onto the bed and went into deep slumber at 4:20AM.

For the next few months Donals and I went on romntic dates and holidays. Our relationship was going gr8. It was our 8 month anniversary and I went to purchase Donald a little gift possibly a can of mt dew or doritos it will be our best anniversary yet. So I gathered my gucci bag Donald bought me with his small loan of a million dollars and left. I let my best frend dat boi look after my swamp while I was gone.

Donald p.o.v

It was shrek and my 8 month anniersary so I decided to go visit him at his murky swamp. When I arrived he wasn't there but someone else was...it was dat boi. He was green just like shrek but he had more vibrancy about him. I could'nt contain it any longer I began having sex with dat boi. he didn't question it. I shoved his unicycle up his ass and he screamed ''O SHIT WADDUP'... I replied by saying flirtatiously ''your unicycle is whats up...UP YOUR ASS!'

Then the door thudded open...it was shrek.''It is not what it looks like shrek''. He didn't answer he opened a can of mt dew and threw it in my face. ''now shrek I like getting wet but not like th-.'' I was interuppted by shrek saying. ''Get out of my swamp''. So I just left with dat boi escorting me out and driving me home. *sigh* well I guess shrek and I are finished but hey I have dat boi now. A new relationship blossomed.

Shrek p.o.v

It has been 3 weeks since Donald and I broke up...and dat boi and I are no longer briends. Now I just smoke weed with snoop and drik mt dew.

Donalds p.o.v

It has been 3 weeks since shrek and I parted I miiss him slightly but Im with a new boi...dat boi his black eyes were empty just like his anus and his unicyclee had a built in vibrator for when we be rollin down the street. I was at dat bois house and there was a mighty thus on the door. Dat boi (or dat bitch as I call him in bed) answered the door and there stood a muscle man with a green cap they call him...JOHN CENA CHAN. John pushed dat boi away and lared at me an said ''I have had my eye on dat boi for over a year. I truly love him. I truly now how to treat him but now you're in my way''. I replied by saying ''listen here muscle man, dat boi is with me. You can go out with Kermit.'' dat boi then said ''FIGHT FOR ME IN A WWE MEGA SMACKDOWN MATCH AT THE RAW ARENA'' Johnny boy and I looked at eachother and nodded. We shook on it ...we will fight for dat bois love.

*2 days l8r*

donalds p.o.v

we were at the wwe arena 4:20PM sharp. I felt sweat beads pour out off all my crevases...not gonna lie John looks like he nows how to fight, especially for love.

Johns p.o.v

I am gonna rip the wig off his peachy ass head.

Donalds p.o.v

the bell then dung and the fight begun. John drop kicked me and I lay on the floor panting in despair. I managed t get back up again and I pounced on Jonnhy boy and kicked him in his nuts of steel. He wasn't phased by it. Darn. He then pulled out a whip and whipped my ass to the ground it reminded me of when shrek whipped me...I wonder what shrek is doing now?.

shrek p.o.v

I can't stop crying and it is not because of the onions...I miss Donald. I then sprung up...I got a tingle going through all of me layers right down me jiblets...something wasn't right...DONALD IS IN TROUBLE I CAN FEEL IT IN ME BONES.

Donalds p.o.v

it wasn't looking good for me I lay on the ground and John stood above lokking down on me saying '' u cant c me''. His voice sounded determind with a slight ring of the wild cabybara. ''any last words'' John assed. I took a breath...possibly my last but then smelt the ovrpowering odour of onions. John looked up confused my the smell. then BOOM shrek broke in through the walls on a giant cannibis leaf with snoop in the back. He hopped down and let out a mighty RAWR. Then with great grace and elegance he flew down and 360 noscoped John cena, killing him. Dat boi then peddled away with great speed. John was covered in blood sweat and tears...he put up a suave fight but n the end his fight fo love...his fight for dat boi just wasn't enough and he perished in battle. At least he went in is natural habitat of the wwe arena.

I looked up and shrek gave me a loving smile...he saved my life...I owe him...I owe him my love again. We then went onto the cannibis leaf and flew back to the swamp.

I then said to shrek ''I owe you'' he replied by saying ''yeah you do''. He then went on one knee and whipped out a ring with the stench o onion and a diamond in the shape of an onion.

Shrek said'' Donald will you marry me, we can have an onion themed wedding?''. I replied with a blunt ''hahah no thankss to much drama'' and with that said I hopped on the cannibis leaf with snoop and flew back to the whitehouse. The wind swept through my lucious locks and my hair blew in the wind.

Shrek p.o.v

As I seen Donald soar off I thought 'maybe it is for the better' but I looked up once more to see my love and his glazed wig fell off his head and glided down right into my hands...'wow, it really was a wig...at least I have a part of Donald with me for the rest of my life it may not be his heart but his wig is good enough'.

I'm now back to being a lonly ogre walking down the aimless road of life, but I like it that way...and with that said...it is all ogre now. ~the end~