The One Next Door

RSVPing To Hell

    When they got to the coffee shop, it looked like Santa had come early just to throw up all over the place. There were Christmas lights dangling from the outside, there were wreaths on the doors, and inside there were numerous illuminated Christmas trees decorated with tinsel and ornaments.
"What the heck happened here?" Sherlock heard John mutter, probably to himself so as not to hurt Molly's feelings.
"It's beautiful!" Molly exclaimed happily, rushing inside to where they had changed out the slow music to Christmas carols.
"What have you done?" Sherlock groaned.
"I see we've got a Scrooge." Sarah decided, sitting on the counter and flipping through a drama magazine.
"It looks amazing!" Molly exclaimed.
"Thanks, I had the fourth shift help me after hours." Jeanette smiled.
"Oh, and we're all in for the party." Molly added.
"I didn't say I was in." Sherlock defended.
"What else could you possibly be doing?" Molly asked.
"My parents like to have me up." Sherlock pointed out.
"On Christmas day." Molly insisted.
"Ya, well, maybe they want me for the whole week." Sherlock defended.
"I certainly hope not. We need our workers that week." Jeanette pointed out.
"I'll be here." Sherlock grumbled.
"Speaking of which, pay day." Jeanette decided, holding up four envelopes. After distributing them, Sherlock found that he had received one hundred dollars instead of just eighty.
"Brilliant, now I'll be able to pay Moran on time." he decided.
"Speaking of which, hold out on grocery shopping because he should be coming around any day." Molly suggested.
"I haven't bought myself a meal in a week!" Sherlock insisted.
"You bought the Chinese last night." John pointed out.
"Oh ya. Well, I haven't in at least twelve hours." Sherlock muttered.
"Oh, sorry, I stand corrected." Molly laughed.
"Don't you have a date with Tom tonight?" John asked.
"Yes I do." Molly agreed.
"We had our date last night." Sherlock muttered.
"It's our turn to eat ice cream and watch cheesy movies then." John decided with a laugh, walking over to counter where Molly and Sherlock were tying on their aprons.
"Ooh, I'm jealous." Sarah decided, throwing the magazine in the trash and hoping down from the counter.
"You're planning that Christmas party, right?" John asked.
"I hardly call it planning, more like ordering the drinks and food and the karaoke machine." Sarah shrugged.
"There's going to be a karaoke machine?" Molly asked.
"Of course! Can't have a party without people singing like dead cats." Sarah insisted.
"Remind me not to get drunk." Sherlock muttered.
"I bet you can sing Sherlock, you seem like the type." Sarah decided.
"What, because I'm gay?" Sherlock asked.
"No, because you seem like a graceful, artsy type of guy." Sarah defended.
"I can't sing, I assure you." Sherlock pointed out.
"We'll just have to judge that for ourselves then." Jeanette laughed as she passed by.
"Oh shush." Sherlock snapped, not having the guts to say anything harsher to his boss.
"Come on guys, we're opening, stop gossiping and get to work." Jeanette insisted, going back to her office to do who knows what. It was a slow shift, maybe with the snow people were less likely to go out and get themselves some coffee. Towards the beginning though, Sarah went out and shoveled the sidewalks with a gigantic red shovel, to make the shop more accessible to the elders who were afraid of a half an inch. There was a gap in the costumer flow, so while Molly and Sarah launched into a conversation about their plans over the holidays, Sherlock brewed a medium roast coffee and a black coffee and went over to sit with John, who was still scrolling through the hardware store merchandise with a glassy look in his eye.
"Slow day today." Sherlock decided, handing him his coffee and sitting in the seat across from him.
"Thanks." John muttered, closing the laptop and leaning on the table with his elbows.
"I'm sure nothing exciting happened at the virtual hardware store?" Sherlock guessed.
"Nothing really, but snow doesn't slow it down." John pointed out. "We've had a large spike in the purchase of snow blowers and shovels though."
"It's barely an inch out there, what are people all fussing about?" Sherlock asked.
"They've had a reality check, it's December, and snow is imminent." John pointed out.
"I don't own a snow shovel." Sherlock shrugged.
"You don't need one, unless it starts to snow in the hallway." John laughed.
"The advantages of living in an apartment building." Sherlock agreed.
"It seems like a domestic life is a lot more demanding." John decided.
"That's why I actively try to avoid it." Sherlock agreed.
"How do you plan on doing that?" John asked.
"I have no idea. I seem to be on the wrong path though, if I want to remain a bachelor forever." Sherlock admitted.
"You certainly are." John agreed. Sherlock sipped his coffee, and it was still way too hot, burning his tongue. He looked over to the counter, were there still weren't any costumers in line; and Carl was flipping through what looked like a cash register manual. That guy really needed to get a girlfriend or something.
"So, should I stop by the store on the way home and get us some tubs of ice cream?" John offered.
"My flat this time, I'll clean up." Sherlock insisted.
"What are you going to do with that lump of clay in the middle of your floor?" John asked with a laugh.
"I was planning on making a gigantic replica of your head." Sherlock decided.
"That's pretty creepy." John muttered.
"I'm joking you idiot. I don't know what I'm going to do with it, inspiration hasn't yet struck." Sherlock admitted.
"And all of those plastic sheets?" John pointed out.
"Are you suggesting we should go your apartment instead?" Sherlock asked.
"Dudley will feel left out." John defended.
"Alright then, fine. Anything that I can do to make sure I don't have to clean." Sherlock agreed. John looked relived, taking the top off of his coffee and blowing softly on the steam rising.
"Are they going to yell at you or something, for being over here? I don't want to get you in trouble." John pointed out.
"I'll be fine. It's not like I'll be doing anything over there either." Sherlock insisted. As he said that, his phone started to buzz in his pocket, and he groaned.
"The time has come." Sherlock sighed, pulling out his phone.
"You look like it's Armageddon." John decided. Sherlock showed John who was calling, one of the only four to have a contact in his phone; his parents. Sherlock reluctantly took the call, holding the phone up to his ear with fear.
"Hi Sherlock!" his mom said excitedly.
"Hi Mom, what a surprise..." Sherlock muttered.
"Well, you know what time of year it is again, it's almost Christmas time and we were wondering if you were available over Christmas weekend." She asked.
"Where else would I be?" Sherlock sighed.
"Don't be all grouchy Sherlock, it feels like we haven't spoken since last Christmas!" Mrs. Holmes defended. Sherlock heard a line add on, which meant his father had picked up the phone as well, to join in on the conversation.
"Hi dad." Sherlock sighed.
"How'd you know I was listening?" Mr. Holmes asked.
"The line clicks. And it's illegal to listen in on other people's conversations without letting them know." Sherlock pointed out.
"I was going to say something eventually." Mr. Holmes defended.
"So, are you coming? Mycroft already said he would." Mrs. Holmes asked. John waved his arms around, pointing at himself.
"Yes, I'll come." Sherlock sighed. John pointed at himself again, mouthing words Sherlock tried to avoid.
"Oh, yes, and could I bring someone along?" Sherlock sighed, making John smile.
"Is it your neighbor Molly? She's such a nice girl." Mrs. Holmes asked.
"No, I've...met someone." Sherlock sighed.
"Ooh, Sherlock has a girlfriend!" Mrs. Holmes said loudly, as if trying to tell her husband through the house, even though they were both on the phone.
"Is that a yes?" Sherlock asked.
"Definitely, bring her down! We might just have to invite the whole family down as well, this is a special treat." Mrs. Holmes said excitedly.
"Please don't, you'll scare them away." Sherlock snapped.
"What's her name?" Mr. Holmes asked.
"Goodbye parents." Sherlock sighed.
"No, Sherlock, tell us more, what should we buy her for..." Sherlock ended the call, setting his phone down on the table with a groan.
"I'm assuming, by that groan, that it's a yes?" John asked.
"You assume correctly. God help us all." Sherlock groaned.
"Come on Sherlock, it'll be fun!" John insisted.
"If by 'fun' you mean torturous, then yes, maybe it will be." Sherlock sighed. "On second thought, it definitely will be."
"Looks like you've got a costumer." John pointed out. Sherlock groaned, getting up and pocketing his cell phone.
"Watch my coffee, I'll be back." Sherlock decided.
"Alright then, I'll make sure no one drinks it." John agreed. Sherlock just rolled his eyes, walking over to where Carl was just taking down names.
"Well, I officially RSVP'd to Hell. Good thing I'll have company." Sherlock decided as they were on their jackets, off to venture into the snow.
"Your parents' house then?" Molly asked. John handed Sherlock his coffee, which was now getting cold, but warn enough to fight off the brisk wind that was hitting them all in the face.
"It can't be that bad, I mean, they seemed pretty enthusiastic." John decided.
"They don't know you're a guy, I just so happened to leave that out of our conversation." Sherlock sighed.
"So you're going to drop the bombshell right when they can't do anything about it?" John asked.
"Unless they want to kick us both out of the house on Christmas Eve day, yes, that is the plan." Sherlock said with a smile.
"They'll be happy either way Sherlock, you're happy and that's all that matters." Molly insisted.
"They said they were going to throw a party, to celebrate one of their socially awkward children finally getting a 'girlfriend' and my parents, and their neighbors, and their friends, and the extended family, and my uncle the priest, are going to have to meet my boyfriend." Sherlock pointed out.
"I'm not embarrassed to be your boyfriend, and neither should you. I'll meet your uncle with a big smile on his face, because while he's preaching against homosexuality, two people met, they fell in love, and they are happy, no matter what he tells us." John insisted, interlocking their fingers confidently.
"I wish I had your views on things John, this world would be a much more pleasant place." Sherlock sighed.
"If you're so worried, you should call back and clear the air, tell them that you've got a boyfriend, and that you're coming down anyway." Molly insisted.
"No, I could never do that. I'll let them have their hope, let them buy more picture frames to hang pictures of their future grandchildren, and then I'll crush them." Sherlock decided with a little evil smile.
"They could still get grandchildren, if they really wanted them." John pointed out.
"That's a long way away John." Sherlock insisted.
"But it's still possible." John pointed out.
"I'm not sure that's safe for the child." Molly decided.
"What, having gay parents?" Sherlock asked.
"No, having Sherlock as a parent. I'm sure you'll forget it at the grocery store overnight." Molly decided.
"Don't be silly Molly. I don't go to the grocery store." Sherlock assured.
"They'll need a trusty godmother to make sure they dress nice and brush their teeth and talk to the other children." Molly decided.
"A happy family of three and that awkward aunt." John decided.
"If I'm no more than an awkward aunt I'll sue you." Molly warned.
"Of course you will be more than that Molly; you're the cement that keeps our lives together. Where would any of us be without you?" Sherlock pointed out, and Molly smiled modestly.
"Well, I'm not sure you two would be together, and Sherlock you might not have even met him, and John, you'd..." Molly started.
"Rhetorical Molly, let's not go into the what if's." John sighed.
"Sorry." Molly muttered.
"Needless to say, you've done everything for us, and with you, we'll be a happy family of four." Sherlock decided with a smile. They all walked into the apartment building stomping the snow from their shoes and shaking the powder off of their jackets, letting themselves defrost in front of the lobby's heater before tromping up the stairs to Molly's apartment.
"I need to decide what to wear tonight." Molly decided with a sigh.
"We could help with that." Sherlock offered.
"I'm not the best critic." John insisted.
"But you're a manly opinion." Molly pointed out.
"Are you saying I'm not?" Sherlock asked.
"You like things with ruffles and bows; I'm not sure Tom will." Molly pointed out.
"I don't like...ruffles and bows..." Sherlock defended.
"Uh huh. Want some food?" Molly offered.
"Certainly." Sherlock agreed, dumping the remainder of his coffee down the sink and pushing Hell Spawn away. The last thing they needed was that cat on a caffeine high. While John made some sandwiches, Molly ruffled through her closet, picking out all of her formal wear, and Sherlock sat on the couch and tried to find a good radio station.
"That's kind of annoying." John decided as he came over with two unproportioned ham sandwiches.
"Sorry." Sherlock sighed, stopping at some crappy pop channel and picking up his sandwich.