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Author's note: This essay is for everyone whose heart broke and is trying to get over the pain. Please take time to finish the essay. Stay strong. :)
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Have you ever loved a person to the point that you thought you were going to have a future together? Have you ever felt happy and excited everytime you were with him/her - like you didn't want to end your time together? He/she was your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye. He/she was the reason you're happy and that you look forward to a brand new day
But everything changed. Suddenly, you felt like there was something wrong. Suddenly, everything felt different - he/she wasn't the same person you fell in love with. He/she doesn't send you long sweet and cute messages when you wake up in the morning and before you sleep at night. He/she wasn't checking on you anymore - asking if you have eaten yet or are you feeling alright today. Suddenly, it felt like he/she was slowly drifting away from you.
Until one day, he/she finally told you, "I wanna break up" "I need space" "I need time for myself" "I don't even know who I am anymore" "I just need to think about it" "It's not that I don't love you anymore" "I just can't do it anymore".
And suddenly, you felt the weight of the world on your shoulder. All the memories you shared felt like a burden. You cried as if there's no tomorrow. Your heart shattered into pieces and nothing could stop it from breaking. You even hated him/her because he/she let you go when you loved him/her wholeheartedly.
"What did I do to deserve this pain?" "What did I lack?" "I gave and trusted my heart to you and yet you didn't take care of it and worse, you even broke it into pieces" "I hate you"
You were filled with anger. You hated the fact that he/she wasn't there anymore to hold you and take care of you - to tell you everything would be alright and that he/she would be there in your weakest and darkest times - never have you thought that it will all end that quick.
"What if he/she really didn't love me and I was blinded by love?" "What if we really weren't meant to be?" "What if he finds another person that can make him/her feel the way he/she made me feel?" "What if" "What if" "What if"
Question and doubts kept running through your head. Nothing feels right by this time and nothing can ever make you feel happy.
But there comes a time that you got used to all the pain that it feels normal - you feel numb, you even forgot what the feeling of being loved is. You were so heartbroken that you never wanted to be in love again.
You don't deserve all of these things you are experiencing. No one deserves all the pain and anger you have - the shattered pieces of your heart, the swollen eyes you've got, the headaches and worst, the life you thought you would've ended.
But I am here to tell you that you're not alone in this world. Yes, someone broke your heart into pieces, but that doesn't mean that no one would pick you up and fix the broken pieces of your heart. He/she isn't the only person in this world. You would say, "but he/she was the only person who loved me", think again, you have people around you that loved you the same or even more than him/her, you were just blinded by his/her love that you didn't see the love others poured into you.
"But he/she was the only one who was there when no one believed in me and saw the best in me", you just thought he/she was the only one, but the fact is, a lot of people was there for you, but you weren't able to see it because you were so focused on him/her. People saw the best in you, but you wouldn't know, would you? Because you were so concentrated on him/her - you didn't even know that your parents, relatives, and friends were so proud of what you've become, just because your eyes were always on him/her.
The world doesn't revolve around him/her, you know? There's a whole new different world apart from your "lovelife". Why not focus in yourself first, or your family and friends? They were the ones that stood by you even if you had most of your time with your boyfriend/girlfriend. They never gave up on you even when you gave up on yourself.
Spending time with people that make you happy is the best way to move on from things.
And sooner or later, you'll realize that there were people with you - people that understood all the heartache and tears. And time and time again, even after the drama and stress, they never failed to listen to your stories about him/her leaving you and be the shoulder you'd cry on.
"Why didn't I know this since before" "Was I this blind" "If only I knew".
Can't you see? Life isn't just about you and him/her. One day, you'll see the truth - the thing is you can never avoid being hurt, getting hurt is inevitable.
But do know that all these experience is what makes you the beautiful and precious person you are today - the person that felt like everything would end, yet didn't give up.
You are important and you matter in this world, self-harm is not the best way to end all of this. You are loved and a blessing to others.
And if you think that nothing in this world is going out right, remember that you will get through it all if you are surrounded by the right people.
If you change the way you look at things, your life changes, so if you're pessimistic, your life would most probably be all negative and sad, but if you think positively and be optimistic, life you be fun and happy.
"There will always be a rainbow after the storm". So don't give up, don't lose hope, cause you'll never know what's in store for you. Don't cry because it's over, but smile because it happened.
Who knows maybe you'll finally meet the "one" in the right place, in the right time with the right people with the right heart.
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So what did you think of this essay? I hope it inspired and encouraged you. :) God bless.
