I. Denying My Love (Damon Salvatore FF)

E l e v e n

"Maybe he didn't get over with me being with Caroline before and making her a human blood bag? Or maybe he thinks that I will do the same with you. Which I can't and won't do to you because you know why? Because I love-" He said with a serious face but I cut off him.

"Yeah. I know." I looked away from his intense gaze.

How can he easily say that he loves me?

I've been in relationships before and being with Tyler, I learned lessons that I'll never forget.

Love shouldn't be taken too easily.

I can't just say that I love Damon this quick. I'm certain that I like him but I don't want to rush everything.

I saw Damon's face fell in the corner of my eyes. My heart throbbed in pain.

I can't see him hurt.

I quickly turned to him and pulled his chin up to make him look at me. He looked up at me with his shining crystal blue eyes as I stared into his.

"Hey. Don't be like this. I like you, okay? Stop acting—"

"Why can't you say that you love me back? Don't you love me the way I do? Why? Tell me." He said with sad eyes, making me look down. I don't really know what to say. I don't want to lie to him.

"Patricia?! Answer me?! I'm like a stupid idiot moron here?!" Damon shouted at me. I can feel few pairs of eyes went to us. I looked up again, feeling anger and sadness rushing through my veins.

"I'm sorry Damon. It's just that, I like you so much and I want to know you better. I don't want to make this fast. And if I say that I love you back, I will just lie to you. I don't want that. I'm sorry Damon. I know, I hurt you with my words but we can talk about this some other time. I don't wanna lose you, Damon." I said with pleading eyes, making him soften and nod.

"I don't wanna lose you either." He whispered to himself but I heard him. Matt came with our food. We were about to start eating when I saw someone sit beside Damon.

Oh shit, it's Matt's mom.

"Hi, Patricia. It's not very nice to see you here." She said, looking at me.

I didn't speak because I'll probably jus say something rude.

Well, I'm a bitch but not in front of Matt and Damon.

She left but not after she smirked. Let me tell you why she hates me. I look like the girl who broke Matt's pure heart. Yep, Elena my twin. So that's it.

Admit it, she's so low.

Matt looked at me and apologized for his mother's act. I smiled and waved him off. We ate our food and after that, Damon sent me home.

"Ah, Thank you for the ride home, Damon." I said, looking at him in the eyes with sadness but I managed to smile.

"Welcome." He said shortly and before walking away.

My heart slightly ached when I saw his back on me.

I slowly went in the house and ran in my room. I laid on my bed, covering my body and face with my blanket.

Do I love Damon or not?

Yes, I don't wanna lose him.

Yes, I like him.

But I can't easily think that I love him, right?

Geez, Pat.

You love him and you know it.

You just keep on denying things because you were hurt before.

A voice in my head said, making me think about it.

Maybe it's right. I'm just denying it.

You don't love her, Pat! He's a vampire and he can make a risk to your family. You can't love a monster!

Another voice in my head said. It has a point but—

Don't listen to it. Listen to your heart, Pat. Even if he's a vampire, you changed him from the cold-hearted to the sweet and loving vampire. You two can fight together. You two can help Elena out of danger with Stefan. You love him, Patricia. You do. Now go and tell him before it's too late.

The first voice said.

That's what I was waiting for.

It opened my eyes. I really love Damon Salvatore with all of my heart, soul and everything.

I jumped up from my bed and ran downstairs. It's 6:34 in the evening now and I don't care if it's past our curfew, I need to get to Damon.

I went outside and hopped on my bike. Luckily, my father put lights on my bike before so I can see in the dark.

I pedaled faster and after 5 minutes, I got to the boarding house. I hopped off the bike and ran to the front door. I saw two cars parked next to my bike but I didn't focus on anything, just to get to him.

I ran inside and was a bit surprised when I saw Caroline, Matt, Elena and Stefan looking at something.

At someone.

I traced where they were looking at, not knowing what will surprise me. They all noticed me since I felt eyes on my direction.

I looked closely and saw that Damon has Matt's Mom pinned up against the wall as they kissed.

The way he kissed me.

I felt my eyes well up as I suddenly felt stupid for believing what he said.

A stray tear fell on my cheek. I don't know if that made Damon stop but he did. He looked at them, realizing there's an audience inside his house. His eyes were blank until his gaze fell to me.

I didn't want to see his face, so I looked down.

I heard the heels of Matt's mom as she ran off and Matt went to get her home. Caroline, Elena, Stefan stayed as they observed me and Damon. My sister was about to speak when I spoke first.

"I can't believe you, Damon. I—I..." I said shaking my head with disbelief. They all stayed quiet. All eyes on me. I'm used to it anyway. "I shouldn't have believed in you."

"You know what? I came here to say to you that I've thought of the things I said earlier at the grill." I smiled bitterly as I looked back at him, his eyes giving away that he's affected by it. "I don't like you, Damon."

Damon looked hurt and betrayed as I said those words. He opened his mouth to argue when I cut him off.

"I love you."

His eyes widened at my confession and I know everyone is surprised too. Elena was about to come to me when I raised my hand, signaling to stop.

"No. I want to be alone. I want to be out of this mess even just for a while. I should probably get used to being hurt in the end alone." I shook my head as I walked to the door. "I don't wanna be like this but you leave me with no choice!" I shouted and went out of the house, leaving them with sad expressions on their faces.

I hopped on my bike quickly and pedaled faster.

When I arrived the house, I threw my bike on the side and went to my room. I packed some things on my bag. Clothes, snacks and all my necessities. I was about to leave after I closed the front door when Elena stood on my way with a smirk.

This isn't Elena.

She has a curled hair like mine but more prominent.

"Well, we haven't officially met. I'm Katherine. You and I will have fun. For now, you have to sleep. Bye." She said and grabbed my head before darkness took me once again.

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Revised on 06.27.17
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