Hey, Can I Touch Your Pants?[ON HOLD]

1~I'm Sexy and I Know It

She moaned.

I smiled showing off my perfectly white teeth as I tugged on her bottom lip. She caved, letting me deepen the kiss. Heh, that was fast.

I squeezed her body to mine and she let out another one of those annoying sounds that I was guessing, she thought were sexy. Her hands traveled up to my hair and pulled roughly.

It was more painful than it was arousing.

I broke the kiss, which wasn't really that good considering how sloppy she was. Perhaps, I had bought her one too many drinks... Her hands gripped my collar as she lunged forward trying to reconnect our lips. I leaned back smirking. She pouted, making her collagen injected lips look even more puffed up. What's up with girls making this face? It's not cute, especially not with such a botched lip job. Well I guess they at least looked natural from a far. 

Shoving her against one of the club's flashing pillars, I took both of her wrists in my left hand and I pinned them above her head. She shivered as my cold fingers began their journey down her side. With how thin her dress was, I could feel every ridge of her bony ribs. Ugh, don't tell me I picked another one of those chicks that starves herself...

She sighed heavily as I began to kiss her exposed collarbone. I nipped and sucked my way up to the nape of her neck. She squirmed against my hold with every caress of my lips against her sticky skin. Mmm... I absolutely love this feeling of control.

I sighed in mild contentment. Then I took a breath, inhaling deeply through my nose. How unfortunate that my sliver of contentment was shattered as I struggled to hold down my dinner. Her perfume... Ugh, did she pour the whole damn bottle on her neck? It smells like she got it for 70 percent off at a pawn shop. Gawd. I can even taste it.

A little pain with the pleasure, I can handle. Bad kissing technique, I can handle.  But if you smell like the fertilizer for your aunt's petunias, now that's a whole different story. Holding my breath, I cringed. I could still hear--and feel--her panting in my ear.

Do I really need to get laid tonight? I braved another whiff. My stomach lurched. Hell no. 

Damn. What a waste of time. I knew I should've gone for her full-figured friend instead. With that thought, time to ditch this popsicle stand. Turning my head to the side, I brushed my lips against the shell of her ear.  I blew into it causing her legs to buckle beneath her. Great...now I gotta hold her up, too? Whatever. She's like 60 pounds anyway.

I spoke close to a whisper, "Thanks for the midnight snack, Sharon."

With that, I let go of my grip and watched her crumple to the floor. She sat there looking flustered and dumb-founded. Hey, at least I left her against one of the pillars and not just in the middle of the dance floor. Ha, that would have been completely insensitive on my part. Flashing her one last gleaming smile, I turned and began towards the entrance.

Sometimes it feels good to leave a girl once she gets fired up, even if it means missing out on a romp in the sack. So many of my fellow brethren have fallen victim to the c0ck teases that are women and are left with the aching reality of blue balls. You could say that it's my duty as an attractive male to make sure some of the opposite sex suffer the same dull ache once in awhile.

I reached the double doors of the club and I paused. Without looking back, I could tell that her eyes were burning a hole through my leather jacket. While basking in that thought, someone caught my eye. I lazily swung my head to the right and winked at a sultry brunette eyeing me up and down. I patted Ronnie, one of the bouncers, on the arm and told him to buy a drink for the lady and put it on my tab.