Strike a Match (Dalton Rapattoni FanFiction)

Chapter 5

SONG CREDITS GO TO DALTON RAPATTONI AND CIMORELLI

Mary-Ellen

I'm in a daze. Dalton had come back for his homecoming. I had ran into Dalton and was able to carry on a conversation. The person who had been there without really trying. I don't think he fully understands how much that means to me, even now.

I was at my retail job, working a midnight shift. As I move a rack of clearance, I check my watch. 12:37 am. We had moves today, and we had shipment coming in at 4:30. I loved the midnight shifts. During the day, there are always things to do, but because the store's open, there's customers that we also have to take care of. If it gets really busy, we don't get the chance to finish what we need to. If I have my midnight shifts, I have the time to finish what needs to be done, without the interruptions, and I can concentrate on what I'm doing.

"Hey, Mary-Ellen, how did Doug want cash wrap organized again? We moved the sports accessories around and have the empty section, but can't remember how he wanted the product placed."

I turned from reorganizing women's clearance to find two other associates behind me, Alex and Isaac. I mentally shook myself back to the present and walked to cash wrap to explain how the hardware needed to be placed for shelves and hooks, and what was going on where.

I went back to the office to log on to our computers and get our new signs printed off. While I was there, I buried my head in my arms. I trusted Alex and Isaac to handle themselves, and if anything happened I had a walkie on me. I felt my head fighting with itself, and let myself give in.

Lately, I had been having panic attacks. I don't know what's been happening for them to be a thing, and I hate it. I had read an article near the beginning of the attacks that gave advice of how to walk through an attack, so I pulled the information to the front of my mind.

I gave into the attack. I knew it was coming, and it would be worse if I fought it. I started making lists in my head. Five things I could see. Four things I could touch. Three things I could hear. Two things I could smell. One thing that I could think of to slowly pull my mind back to reality. People would make so much fun of me if they found out, but I had very song Dalton recorded or covered on a playlist on my iPod. He had been my constant for years, and when he left, and I realized the impact he had, I made it so he was still my constant to help me through. What I always thought of to pull me back to reality was his Disney Dudez video. It helped me out of my hell more than anything else because he wasn't afraid of what people would think, he pushed forward.

It took about five minutes, but I finally calmed down. I heard a light knock on the door frame, and looked up to see Isaac. He looked worried when he saw my tear stained face, but I gave him a small smile and shook my head. He walked into the office and sat in the other office chair.

"You're okay?"

I nodded. My head manager knew about the attacks, and Isaac had walked in on one a couple weeks ago while Rebecca was talking me through the attack. That's something I truly respect about Isaac. He doesn't push, but he always makes sure the people around him are looked after. He checks in when he sees I'm having a low day, just to see if there's anything he can do. It was one of those days I was thankful he was there, because I did need someone's touch, even though the person I wanted there was halfway across the country.

I checked the clock again and called Alex to the back room for our lunch break. I know, lunch at midnight, but what else do you call it? Midnight snack? I'm genuinely not sure. I climbed out of my chair and Isaac followed, punching out of our time clock. I collapsed in one of the metal chairs in the break room, my Starbucks I had stored in the fridge in front of me. Isaac again sat beside me, and I leaned my head on his shoulder. I felt him tense, because I normally don't initiate contact, but he also understood what I needed. His hand made its way into my hair, and slowly rubbed the pads of his fingers along my scalp.