Crush // Calum Hood

Chapter 11

"You really thought I'd fall in love with someone like you?" He chuckled in my face.

I stare blankly at him with tears streaming down my face. I thought he loved, I thought he was different, but he didn't and he wasn't.

He walks back over to the tall blonde, grabbing her hand and walking off down the street, leaving me in the middle of the darkness, drowning in my own tears.

I open my eyes to find myself laying in bed, woken from yet another Calum dream. I drag my hands down my face and rub my eyes as I lean over to grab my phone. It's 3am, my heads banging and I feel like I can't breathe.

I roll out of Ashton's bed and walk down the hallway, the kitchen light shining down into the darkness. I peek around the corner to find Ashton hunched over at the counter top with papers surrounding him.

"Ashton?"

He lifts his head up while running his hands down his tired face.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" I make my way over to him.

"No no, you didn't" he shakes his head and starts to gather his papers.

I pull out a stool next to him and glance at the papers, bills, bills and more bills. Why does he have piles of bills? He's always up to date with everything and never leaves anything to the last minute, that's the way he's always been.

"What are those?" I look from the papers to him, knowing exactly what they were.

"Nothing" he bluntly answers "why are you awake?"

"Bad dream" I scrunch up my nose.

Ashton moves closers.

"Are you okay? You don't look too good" he moves a loose piece of hair from out of my face.

"Thanks" I roll my eyes and laugh.

"You know what I mean"

He gets up and grabs a glass and fills it up with cold water before grabbing some nurofen from the top cabinet.

"Here" he slides both over to me.

"Thanks"

I pop the nurofen on my tongue and gulp the cold water down.

"Better?" He takes the glass and puts it in he sink.

"Physically yes, mentally hm not sure" I laugh and rub my forehead.

This whole thing with Calum was really messing with me. I was in so deep that I wouldn't talk to any other guys, because it felt wrong talking to them because I was so in love with this damn boy who didn't look twice at me. Because I'd be waiting for Calum to turn around and confess his love for me, but it never happened.

"Hey?" Ashton's face filled with worry.

He sits down on the stool next to me, pulling it over closer. He rests one arm on the counter top and lifts the other one around my back, looking deeply into my face.

"Nothing don't worry" I shake the thought of Calum away.

"No, tell me Erika"

I turn around to look at Ashton in the face. I laugh and shake my head, trying to fight back the tears. I don't know why but just the thought of the whole Calum situation made me emotional, mad and more than anything stupid.

"I just" I stop, Ashton staring at me waiting for me to continue "no it doesn't matter, I don't want to burry you with my thoughts and feelings"

"You know that your thoughts and feelings are important to me Erika, I care for you so much and you need to tell me if something or someone is bothering you" he rubs his hand up and down my back.

With that being said I couldn't hold in the tears anymore, I burst out crying, throwing up my hands to cover my eyes.

"Erika, what's bothering you?" Ashton moves closer and levels his face with mine.

I take a breathe and wipe my eyes and nose.

"It's stupid really" I laugh.

"I'm all ears" he faintly smiles "we'll go to the lounge room" he stands up and wraps his arm around my neck as we walk to the dark lounge room.

He turns on the lamp next to the lounge, it gave off a very dim light but it was enough for me to see Ashton's bags under his eyes.

"Okay now, tell me" he sits down close to me.

I wipe my face once again and take a deep breathe.

"Calum" I sigh.

Ashton jumps up with anger covering his tired face.

"What has he done?!"

"Nothing, he's done...nothing" I play with my fingers.

"What do you mean?"

"I just, I want him to feel the same as I do and I know you can't change how a person feels towards you but it's been 3 years Ashton" my voice breaks "I can't even talk to other guys because it feels so wrong" I cry.

Ashton sighs and looks at the ceiling, wrapping his arms around me and bringing me close to his chest.

"Erika, I know I've said this over and over again but that boys no good, especially for you"

"I know and I've realised that but the feelings are still there and stronger than ever and tonight, he made me feel so happy but yet so confused, I can't stop my feelings for him" I wipe my eyes as I continue to cry.

Ashton holds me tighter and rests his chin on top of my messy bed hair.

"Give it time Erika, if nothing happens, so be it, the feelings with eventually wear off and you'll move on with your life. And if something does happen well, it happens" his words are soft and he understands so well.

"How come the ones you want, never want you back?" I can feel my heart aching.

"I don't know" his voice cracks "but it sure does hurt a whole lot"

From then on, Ashton and I stay cuddled up in the lounge room in silence. He plays with my hair until I fall asleep in his arms. I couldn't ask for a better friend than Ashton, I know we don't always see eye to eye but he's always looking out for me and understands.

I just wish I knew what was up with him.

((Helloooo my loveliessss! So this chapter is sorta short and I'm not sure how I feel about it. But anyways what do you guys think is wrong with ash?? What do you think will happen from now on?? PLEASE PLEASE COMMENT YOUR THOUGHTS AND VOTE!! xox))