Alpha's Choice

| 11 | Finding You |

| Alexander Cloud |

It's funny to think that we all go through our days and life as if it were a to-do list. Think about it. For kids; you have to wake up, shower, get dressed, pack your bag, eat breakfast and go to school. Adults are the same: wake up, fix themselves up, get their kids ready, if they have, go to work and so on. One goes through life thinking everything's going to fall into place. That the tools you need will fall into place and you just have to use them and do what needs to be done. That everything will stay together, everyone will stay together and nothing tragic will happen. I guess me being from a world where death is common and the impossible happens I shouldn't worry about things like that, but here I am.

In all honesty, for me, those rules applied. In the general aspect for wolves, we are born, raised, trained and study. At sixteen, we shift and expect meeting our mates and at eighteen to twenty we prepare to take the title that is passed onto us if you have one, and then grow, create a family and repeat the same cycle with one's own children. I was the first-born child of the Beta and Beta female of The Rockstone Pack. I already had my destiny laid out for me. I would grow up to be the next Beta, the next second in command to the next Alpha, which meant I had to not only befriend him but spend a lot of time with him because those two titles form a partnership that depends on trust and our roles were to be protectors and leaders of our pack. I started school and training at a young age soon then to find out I would be a big brother to the smallest little pup. She had changed my course in life.

From the first time I saw her, in my father's arms as my grandma brought me to the hospital room where my parents were, I knew I had a new title, a new job and a new goal in life. To be a big brother, a protector, provider and role model. It was my responsibility to make sure she was prepared for things, since I had the experience she didn't. She became one of my best friends and I loved her.

I thought I knew everything about her, about myself, but here I am, eighteen years old and I have yet to meet my mate. I'm preparing through the final steps to take my title as Beta. My parents are M.I.A still, my grandfather has fallen ill again and my little sister has run away from home. At what point did everything flip upside down?

I've been nothing but stressed and restless for the last couple of months. Mom and dad keep disappearing especially after they found out about Maddy. Cole and I have been drowning in pack work. I don't want to hang out with the guys, and I'm not myself. Ever since Madison disappeared I've been empty. I've felt like it was my fault somehow, and that I could have done something to prevent it from happening. Like I could have prevented it from happening in a way. I thought I knew my sister, but I guess not. To think that her situation had gotten to the point that she had to run away from home made me feel useless. It makes me feel like I've failed at my job as her protector. What could have happened? I've been doubting my ability to take the role of Beta. How can I sever and protect my pack if I couldn't do that to the one person who means everything to me? I miss my baby sister and I just hope she's okay and alive out there.

I don't think I'll be able to live my life like I use to. I don't think there will be anything that can cheer me up.

I was walking around town just trying to get some air. Cole said I needed a break so I left. I go out and bought myself a soda and sat on the park bench watching the little kids play, remembering me and Maddy at that age. After a while, I get up and start walking around again.

I walk towards the Library. It was Madison's favorite place to go to, I don't know why, but she loved to read. I walk inside and the cool air hit's my skin making me shiver. It feels good in here. I walked around and just looked at the many books. I remember I would come here because mom would ask me to pick her up, she would be cradled on a couch, her nose in a book.