It's Funny...

Rant

if you don't want to hear a rant then read something else, these are my opinions as to what has happened to me.

It's funny how someone can treat you. Just like your nothing. And it's funny because they're your best friend. They complain all the time about how they're hurting but don't bother to ask how your doing. They tell you " You don't know what it's like to be depressed" but they don't understand that you do. They go on and on about how hurt they are, and you listen for hours, but not once are you asked " What about you" or " Are you ok?". You sit back because you're the quieter one. You have a voice, you just don't know how to use it. They tell you that nobody cares about them, yet when they cry out, people are rushing to comfort them, but when you cry out, nothing. That word, nothing. The definition is " not anything; no single thing". The word carries so much emptiness, and you fell the pain that word brings along with it. Nothing is like that friend. You know it, it's always been with you. There are days when it gets close to you, and days when you want it to go the fuck away. But it doesn't. Nothing, is that friend. That friend that cries of hurt, and anger. That friend that cries of abandonment. You are that shoulder that they cry on, as well as your own shoulder you cry on. Their worst fear is being abandoned, yet they act in that fear so well. They leave you the first time, and you beg for them to come back, and they do. They apologize but shortly after your left again. This time for good. They say it's your fault and they did nothing. That old friend you know so well is back. Only, this time your not going to take it. You speak up for yourself and it feels great. But that feeling only lasts for so long. After that nothing returns. It consumes you. You get worse. You hurt yourself and it feels great. No one knows and if they do, you're being dramatic. You can't forget this friend and the nothing it brings, so you give up. Nothing wins.