Through the Smoke

Chapter 6 (Conclusion)

*****

It's the beginning of summer and I've begun writing again. I think this will turn out to be more of a novella though that is subject to change. It depends on where the overall plot takes me. Wanting to focus on something light and fluffy it's a romance with a healthy dose of comedy. At least I hope anyone who reads it will deem it funny. And romantic. I haven't shared any of it with anyone. Since I'm on friendly terms with them both I've thought about emailing what I've written thus far to Mia or Kelly. Maybe both, maybe neither.

Is it weird that my ex-girlfriend from high school who became my psychiatrist during my stay at a mental hospital and my ex-wife are my best friends? Is it weird that they have developed a friendship of their own? Yes, that's what I thought. It's totally weird and yet...it's nice. Nice and weird. Weirdly nice. Uh huh.

I should get back to work and stop thinking about them. Okay, I'll continue thinking about my ex-girlfriend and my ex-wife just long enough to share a dream I had last week. There I was seated on the couch in my new condo bored out of my mind enough to watch an infomercial focused on a knife sharp enough to glide through a brick without much effort. Dream Jordan was contemplating grabbing her credit card to purchase this wickedly sharp knife when the doorbell rang.

Her original intention was to ignore the caller because one, anyone at her door at that time of night had to be an axe murder and two, if she didn't hurry up and call within the next few minutes she wouldn't be able to get a second wickedly sharp knife free--just pay separate shipping and handling. Although really yearning to cut some shit up with that knife Dream Jordan chose to discover who could possibly be ringing at two in the morning.

Not looking through the peephole she unlocks and opens the door, eyes widening a bit when she sees Mia standing there wearing a radiant smile. Oh, and clothes. She invites her inside, puts on a pot of tea (although Real Jordan prefers coffee) and when she reenters the living room with a tray holding two steaming cups and a saucer of butter cookies she discovers not one, but two exes on her couch--no separate shipping and handling charges necessary. What's weird is that neither of them has any clothes on. All right, that might fall under the category of weirdly nice.

What happens next? Would you like to know? So would I. Unfortunately, I don't have a freaking clue because the alarm clock chose that precise moment to go off. Granted, I'm the one responsible for it causing me to awaken. The little electronic thing was merely doing its job, yet I still wanted to toss it out the window.

So, yes, I believe I almost had a naughty dream about Mia and Kelly, which made me feel both dirty and titillated. Until that dream it had been over two years since I experienced such feelings. Had begun to think that part of me eternally fractured. Apparently my libido had just been on an extended vacation and now I'm unsure what to do with it.

Should I start dating? I don't know how to date. I mean, I've barely dipped a toe in the dating pool. I was with Kelly from age sixteen to eighteen, then Mia age twenty-one to thirty-four. Yes, there was a three-year gap when I was single, but I spent the bulk of that period feverishly writing while holding down a job--sometimes two. I don't know how to date. I'm much better at creating characters to date. Just to clarify I create them to date each other, not me. I'm not crazy. Not that crazy at least.

I actually don't want to date. Not someone new anyway. Regardless of almost naughty dreams I've given it considerable thought and I know what I want. Who I want. This friendship is great, but I love her. Are my feelings reciprocated? I don't know. She used to love me, but I can't tell if any of that love has remained or returned. I'd ask yet I'm too much of a chicken. If she were to reject my feelings that might cause my heart to shatter. I'd prefer never to know one way or another than to learn I'm in love alone. Ignorance can definitely be bliss.

Therefore, I should date. Force myself to. Perhaps I should visit one of those dating websites, create a profile and take a selfie à la Kim Kardashian except I'd wear more clothing. Yes, maybe I'll do that. Tomorrow. Next week. Next month for sure. Probably.

Hands on the computer keys I take several deep breaths and begin to type.

She scrolled through her contacts list searching for the name that set her skin afire when a knock at the front door caused her to curiously look in its direction.

Someone knocks on my door. Oh, that's not freaky at all. I glance toward the clock in the lower right corner of the screen. 8:32 PM. That's not exactly late, but I rarely have visitors around this time when I'm not expecting them. Making sure my work is saved, I close the application, push my chair back and stand up as my unexpected visitor knocks again. Yelling that I'm on my way, I hurry across the living room and look through the peephole. A smile upturns the corners of my mouth.

"Who is it?"

Her voice is filled with amusement as she replies, "The big bad wolf. Let me in before I blow your house down."

"I'm sorry, but I think you have the wrong condo. You're looking for the three little pigs. They live upstairs." My smile intensifies when she throws her head back laughing.

"Aw, c'mon, lady. Why don't you invite me in for a cup of tea?"

Tea? I'm reminded of that dream. Nope, still not freaky. "You just threatened to destroy my condo and you expect me to play hostess?"

"Damn, I'm sorry, all right?"

"So heartfelt."

Expression sobering she looks toward the peephole, obviously assuming I'm looking at her. "What if I told you I loved you? Would you invite me into your home then?"

I think my heart just performed a cartwheel. "What?"

A nervous smile flits across her lips. "It's true. I love you, Jordan. And I don't have a clue if you feel the same way, but I couldn't keep it to myself any longer. I'm grateful that we're friends, but can't help being greedy by desiring more. Actually, I never stopped loving you. You're my soul--"

Having opened the door, my mouth prevents the remainder of that sentence when it makes contact with hers. Several kisses later my forehead rests against hers, dopey smiles on our faces. "You had me at big bad wolf." She emits a delightful chuckle as I clutch the front of her shirt and tug her into my home. I suppose Real Jordan will be able to keep her toe out the dating pool after all.

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I hoped you enjoyed this lil' story. Yes, I deliberately left it open as to which lady is at Jordan's door at the end. If you think it's Mia you're correct. If you think it's Kelly you're correct. It's up to you ;-)

Though I am curious if anyone has a preference...